A Conscious Re-Coupling
by Ms.E1928
Summary: Fitz is no longer in the White House and he and Mellie are divorced. When she starts to live her life separate from his will he be able to let the past go? Sequel to Walk Away
1. Chapter 1

A/N This is a sequel to Walk Away. Apparently I'm not satisfied unless I am writing at least two fics at a time. Sigh I'm a glutton for punishment.

"Thank you so much for watching Teddy and Tommy for me." Mellie rushed around trying to find the shoes that she was going to wear out. I can feel her nervous tension and I am curious as to what has Mellie so nervous.

"Of course Mels they are my sons."

"I know Fitz, but it was last minute and this isn't your night." I nod just starting at her. Mellie and I are on a friendly basis so I feel that I can ask her what's going on.

"You ok?" She stops fretting around and looks at me surprised.

"Yeah I am why do you ask?" She cocks her head to the side.

"You seem nervous ." Mellie nods.

"I am nervous." She laughs lightly. "It's so stupid. It really is, it's not like I've never been on a date before." I had looked over to where Tommy sat on the floor playing, but when she mentioned date my head whipped around.

"You have a date?"

"Yeah Fitz I have a date, don't sound so surprised." She mistakes my tone for something else.

"No I didn't mean it like that. I'm just...nevermind."

"Well I have their bags packed already."

"Oh you know what I'm just going to watch them here." Mellie looks at me out the corner of her eye. "It's still your time with them I don't want to take them away. I'll just watch them here that way they won't have to be disrupted and shuttled unnecessarily."

"Ok sure." She seems satisfied with my statement. I don't want to disrupt the boys too much, but I also want to get a glimpse at this guy that she's going on a date with. Mellie leaves the room to finish dressing and I sit on the floor playing with Tommy. Teddy sits on the couch reading a book.

The doorbell rings and I hop up from the couch and head to answer it. I look around and Mellie is nowhere in sight. When I open the door it's like I'm looking in the mirror. Apparently she has a type. He whoever he is extends his hand.

"Mr. President." I look down at his hand before reluctantly taking it.

"I'm at a disadvantage here you know who I am ,but I have no clue who you are."

"Alexander McMichaels"

"Ahhhh McMichaels and Stevens?"

"Yes." I know of the law firm. She really did have a type.

"I see you two have met." Mellie appears behind me.

"We have." I say flatly turning towards her. She gives me a quizzical look, but brushes it aside.

"I won't stay out too late. Kiss the boys goodnight for me." I nod waiting for my customary goodbye kiss, but there is none forthcoming. My spirits fall and I step away and close the door after they walk through it .

Alexander chats constantly on the way to the restaurant, but my thoughts are elsewhere. I can't help thinking about Fitz's behavior. He appeared upset about me going out with Alexander. I shake my head thinking maybe I'm imagining things. Since Fitz and I divorced he's dated here and there so he shouldn't have an issue with me dating.

"You are a million miles away." I shake myself out of my mental ramblings and look over at Alexander.

"Sorry, just thinking about if I told Fitz what story to read Tommy tonight. He is very particular about his bedtime stories."

"You and Fitz seem pretty close still."

"Not still, but more like now. We've had our ups and way down in the dumps." He smiles at me and I return the smile.

"Well I hate a marriage to break up, but I can't entirely be too sad since I have a chance with you now." I don't know what to say to him. I just smile again. We arrive at the restaurant and he leads me in. Heads turn, I'm used to living a public life. Fitz and I divorced before his term was up and I was no longer the first lady, I essentially returned to civilian life except for the constant agents around.

"Would you ever want to return to practice?" I take a sip of my wine before answering.

"Is that why you wanted to go out with me? Is this a job interview?" I say in a teasing tone.

"This is a wife interview." I can't keep the shocked look off my face. "Wow I have rendered Mellie Grant speechless." He chuckles lightly and I join in.

"I do have to admit that took me by surprise."

"I hope I wasn't too forward."

"No not at all. I like forward." He leans back in his chair and stares at me. I feel the overwhelming urge to squirm under his gaze, but I stay still and just look him in the eyes.

"How did he let such an exquisite creature go?" I can't help shifting in my seat at his statement. "I'm sorry that was out of line." I shake my head.

"No it's fine and I'm flattered." I don't really want to talk about Fitz or my relationship with him. I change the subject and I am able to keep any other conversations away from my former husband.

The boys went to bed shortly after Mellie left and I've just been left with my thoughts. I've had a lot of time to do some checking into Alexander McMichaels and to my anger I found nothing out of the ordinary. I was hoping he was a dirty rotten scoundrel, but I guess one of those was enough for her. I sigh wondering what they are doing right now. I look at my watch its half past ten and I am tempted to call her on her cell, but I know that's petty. Although petty doesn't really bother me that much. For the third time in the last thirty minutes I stand and look out the windows, looking for any sign of Mellie and there is none. I stalk back into the living room and flop down on the sofa in full sulk mode. I don't want her out with him and I don't care how childish I'm being.

Finally at ten after eleven I hear the door opening. I sit on the sofa with my arms crossed which is where she finds me.

"Fitz I'd have expected you to be sleep by now." I look at her wondering why she thought I'd be sleep. Was she planning on sneaking him in?"

"Nope." Mellie looks at me and cocks her head to the side.

"Something wrong? Did the boys not behave for you?" Mellie stands on one leg and removes one of her heels. My gaze scans down her body and to her long shapely legs.

"No they were fine. We had dinner, I gave baths and they went to bed without a fuss." Fitz is dry with me and I'm confused about his attitude.

"Thanks again for looking after them." He abruptly stands from the sofa.

"I told you they are my sons you don't have to thank me for being their father." He states gruffly and I crease my forehead surprised by his behavior.

"You ok?"

"Yeah I need to get going." He grabs his jacket and throws it on. His agents are waiting outside for him to take him back to his place. I move forward to hug him and give him a good night kiss, but he side steps me. "I'll see you Mellie." He leaves without another word to me and I stand rooted in place in his wake.

"What just happened?" I mutter to myself.

I know that I was completely out of line with Mellie, but I don't want her dating. It's not right, but I'd rather her be alone if she isn't going to be with me. Mellie wanted the divorce and I reluctantly gave it to her, but that doesn't mean that I don't still want my wife back. She'll always be my wife, she will always be mine. I huff and sit back against the leather seats of the town car heavily. I'm in a pissy mood this was not how I expected my night to go. I'm trying to turn over a new leaf and so I won't interfere, but that doesn't mean I'm going to be happy about this and give her my blessing.


	2. Chapter 2

A/N Happy New Year to everyone. (Not sure what's happening with this chapter why it is getting deleted, but let's try this again)

I'm packing the boys up so that we can head over to Fitz's. We are having our normal family dinner on the night that Fitz and I exchange the kids. Fitz and I haven't talked much since my date with Alexander. After his reaction I decided to make sure I called the babysitter anytime I was going to go out with Alexander.

We arrive at Fitz's, he lives only twenty minutes from my place. He settled into a luxury condo with gorgeous expansive views of the capital. It's not as kid friendly as my place but I do like to come over and just spend time on his balcony lost in my own thoughts.

I let myself in, I have a key to his place he has a key to mine. The boys immediately go bursting into the house, screaming for their dad. I smell delicious food and I know he's cooking for us tonight which he occasionally does and I always enjoy it much more than takeout.

Fitz comes out of the kitchen and gives the boys big hugs and kisses. I walk over to him and kiss his cheek.

"What are you cooking it smells amazing?"

"For the kids chicken fingers and fries." He laughs lightly. "For us beef wellington, garlic whipped mashed potatoes, and steamed asparagus."

"OMG Fitz! That sounds amazing. What's the occasion for all that decadence?" He just shrugs and gives me a sheepish smile.

I can't tell her that I'm hoping to make her remember how good it is to be my wife. I want her to remember all the good times we had, the positive reasons why we got married and fought so long and hard for it.

"Oh and I made a chocolate raspberry mousse for dessert." Mellie shrieks and I laugh. I'm glad she's happy.

We finally sit down to dinner and Mellie is pleased that even though I made chicken fingers and fries for the boys it's not processed but something I made from scratch.

"Gosh this food is amazing. I don't want to stop eating even though I'm headed toward being way too full." I decide to break the silence. Fitz is being unusually quiet and withdrawn tonight.

"Well you can take some home if you don't finish it." He takes a slow sip of wine. I feel like there is something on his mind.

"Is there anything you want to talk about?"

"No is there anything you want to talk about?" I'm confused by this wall he's put up. This isn't how our dinners usually go. We usually have lively conversations.

"Nope."

"When you going out with Alexander again?" I nearly choke on my wine when he asks.

"That question came out of nowhere."

"Hmm well when?"

"Tomorrow night." I think I see his jaw clinch slightly."Are you angry with me about something?" Fitz and I have worked to stop being so reactionary. We learned that it's best to talk out our feelings than to hold everything inside and then just explode.

"Why would I be angry with you?"

"Now I know you are since you're answering a question with a question."

"Is he helping you brush up on your cross examination skills?" The way he says he, the curl of his upper lip. It dawns on me, he's jealous.

"No Alexander is not although I have been thinking of going back into practice."

"Humph is that why he's dating you because he wants Mellie Grant to come work for him. I'm sure that'd be a huge get." I look up from my plate and I know I've gone too far. I see the momentary flash of pain grace her beautiful features and I feel like an asshole.

"Just because I wasn't enough for you doesn't mean all men feel that way about me." Her voice is uncomfortably low and smooth.

"I'm sorry Mels I really am." She just nods and looks away from me. "I don't want you dating him." She looks back over at me.

"Why what's wrong with Alexander?"

"He isn't me." I knew that he was jealous, but I really thought we were past this especially since he's dated and bedded other women.

"Fitz you've dated since we have divorced and I didn't interfere."

"I'm not interfering am I? I'm just telling you that I don't like it. One of the biggest issues we had during our marriage was not being honest and I'm being honest like Dr. Mckenzie taught us."

"I didn't try to discourage you from dating. I wasn't even jealous when I realized you were sleeping with Sarah why are you being this way?" I notice he frowns when I mention Sarah.

"Are you sleeping with him?" He asks incredulously like I wouldn't have the right to do so.

"I'm not doing this with you. It's insulting and ridiculous."

"So that's a yes." He states sternly.

"That's a it's none of your business Fitzgerald." I stand ready to leave. He holds out his hand to stop me.

"I'm sorry Mels. I really am. Please don't be angry with me." He looks at me pleading. His crystal clear blue eyes begging me for forgiveness and I give it to him. I always give in to him, well almost always.

"I'm not angry Fitz. Just confused."

"Why? You know I still love you and I want you back. Did you think I'd roll out the red carpet for any man that you brought into your life to replace me."

"First I didn't think it would matter since you yourself have dated since our divorce, since you were dating while we were still married." He winces and I know that was a low blow, but it's true. "Secondly I'm not with Alexander to replace you. I like him and he likes me. It's nice."

"Mellie he's a clone of me. And why do you want someone that just likes you when you can have someone that loves you wholly?" I can't do this with him, I just can't.

"I need to get going Fitz." He stands with me. I kiss the boys goodbye. Fitz walks me to the door.

"Please don't be angry with me." He states again with his eyes pleading.

"I'm not, but you have to let me go Fitz. We are done. Since we have been divorced our relationship is much better. We don't fight, we can be in the same room longer than five minutes there's no pretending. It's better this way." Mellie is smart, very bright and intelligent and I just don't understand why she can't see that all this is possible because of the therapy that we had, that we could apply those same tenants to a more personal relationship. I don't want to argue with her so I just nod.

"I'll work on it." She hugs me briefly before saying goodnight and leaving.


	3. Chapter 3

My last conversation with Fitz is dancing in my head. I really didn't think he'd mind me dating. I wouldn't have been so open about Alexander if I thought he'd give one shit. I know that Fitz didn't want the divorce, but once it was all over and done with and we settled into our new relationship as friends and co-parents I thought he was over it all, I was wrong.

"You're drifting on me again. I must be very boring." Alexander laughs lightly although I know he isn't really joking.

"Just thinking about a conversation I had with Fitz." He arches his brow and I realize for the first time how much he does look like Fitz and I am slightly uncomfortable.

"What was this conversation about that has you a million miles away?" I take a deep breath unsure if I should tell him, but if I learned one thing from my relationship with Fitz is that I should be honest.

"You." He looks surprised.

"Me? What about me?"

"It's really silly."

"Make me laugh." He shifts towards me more on the couch and takes a sip of wine. Alexander wanted to stay in tonight. He had his chef make us a meal and it was delicious although I couldn't stop thinking about the wonderful meal Fitz cooked just the night before .

"He just has a problem with me dating you." He folds his lips in and seems to be contemplating something.

"Me or you dating in general?" I laugh a bit although I feel no humor.

"He's just concerned about me not spending enough time with the kids." That sounded lame even to me.

"He's jealous that you are dating. It's ok Mellie you can tell me. I don't blame him one bit I'd be jealous too. You are magnificent." He leans in and brushes his lips against mine. My lips tentatively part to allow his tongue entrance. His arms move around my back and I feel him pulling me tighter to him. My arms coil their way around his neck and he pulls me slightly onto his lap. I immediately feel him start to harden underneath me. Alexander's hands slowly make their way down my back until he is lightly cupping my ass, he gives it a gentle squeeze. I know I need to stop this before things go further than I am comfortable with. I push against his chest and disengage from his mouth.

"We should slow down." He leans in and kisses my neck.

"You sure?" I push again.

"Absolutely." I try to move off his lap, but he holds me against him. I close my eyes trying to quail the rising panic, but my heart begins to race and my palms feel sweaty. "Alexander I really should be going." He finally releases me and I have to try to swallow down the fear that was beginning to take over my body.

"Sorry I just, you are so incredibly beautiful and I got carried away." He gently strokes my face and I can see in his deep blue eyes that he is truly sorry.

"It's easy to get carried away. I really should be going." He nods and I stand from the sofa to gather my belongings. We hug and I give him a quick kiss on the cheek before leaving. Once I am safely in the back of my town car I let out a ragged breath.

Three Days Later

I haven't seen Alexander since the other night, he went out of town on business and I am a bit relieved. I was more shaken by my encounter with him than I initially realized. I mostly handle the aftermath of my assault well, but every now and then I have a moment. My thoughts are cut short when I hear Fitz coming in with the boys. I stand from the sofa and go to greet them. When he sees me he holds a finger to his mouth. He is carrying both of them who are knocked out. I take Tommy from him and we put the boys down on their beds.

"What did you do to them?" I say laughing.

"Zoo wore them out."

"Oh didn't know you were going to the zoo today."

"Neither did I." He laughs lightly. I offer him some iced tea and we settle back on the sofa.

"What do you want to do for dinner tonight?" He shrugs.

"We can order out. Pizza or something." He's being weird around me again.

"Yeah I'm sure the boys will love that." The conversation trails off and I sit staring at him. "You still angry with me?" He takes a deep breath.

"I was never angry with you. I can't be angry with you for going on with your life, I'm just not keen on the whole thing that's all."

"Just because I'm dating doesn't mean we can't still be friends. It feels like you are pulling away from me."

"I'm trying to..." I stop not sure how to explain my feelings. I sigh and decide to just be honest. "I'm trying to shield my heart Mels. I am always hopeful that we can be together again, but if you stay with Alexander I'll be crushed the way I feel right now. So I figured I'd just start trying to pull away from you." She looks stunned at my admission.

"Fitz I don't want you not to be in my life." My ears perk up and I know that I am getting my hopes up for nothing, but I am an eternal optimist when it comes to Mellie. "We have been such an integral part of each other's lives for so long I can't imagine that not being the case."

"Mels you know that I'm still in love with you and you also know that I'm a jealous man. It just kills me to know you are with him."

"Fitz." She says my name in warning. Teddy comes running into the living room and we are saved from having any additional conversation.

Eventually Tommy wakes up and we order dinner. There is no further talk of our relationship while the boys are around. Mellie and I give the boys baths and then they are back out for the night.

"Teddy wants to go to the new dinosaur exhibit at the National Museum of Natural History."

"Sure I'll take him."

"Well I was thinking we could all go together." She shrugs her shoulders.

"Sure we can all go together."

"Tomorrow?" Mellie looks at me suspiciously.

"Why tomorrow?"

"Because I may have arranged a private tour for us tomorrow."

"Fine tomorrow." She goes about tidying up after our dinner.

"I figured I could just stay here tonight and we could head out together in the morning." Mellie's wiping of the countertop comes to an abrupt halt.

"Really Fitz?"

"What?"

"What?" She mimics me. "You know what. "

"It's more efficient if I just stay here,than go all the way to my place only to have to come all the way back over here in the morning."

"Fitz you live twenty minutes away." I shrug at her.

"Fine you can sleep in the guest room." I step closer to her.

"Or I can sleep in your room." She gives me a stern look. "So you don't have to make the guest room up." I say clarifying my point.

"It's not a problem it's already made up from the last time you stayed over." She says walking around me with a smile on her face.

Mellie and I decide to go sit out on her patio and enjoy the warm breeze. The daylight time was scorching, it was nice to have the warm breeze at night.

"So which one of my agents do you have reporting back to you?" Mellie says before taking a sip of her wine. I nearly choke on mine when I turn to her she is looking at me, mischief dancing in her sapphire eyes.

"I have no clue why you think I'd..." She holds her hand up.

"Save it Fitz I know you, I've known you for nearly thirty years. Which one of my agents do you have reporting back to you?" I shake my head not willing to divulge any of my secrets.

"Let's just enjoy the night." She laughs and shakes her head.

"I'll find out soon enough and then they are out." We sit for a little while longer on the patio neither saying much of anything. It's a nice place to be when we can sit with each other in comfortable silence. After about an hour we decide to retire for the night.

"You sure you don't want me to sleep in the bed with you? I can keep you warm."

"It's still 79 degrees out I don't need to be kept warm, but thank you." She makes a move to walk up the stairs.

"You know sweating is a great way to keep cool." Mellie stops her movement and turns around to me. I step up on the step below the one she is standing on. "I know it's been awhile since you've sweated." I hear the almost imperceptible hitch in her breathing and I feel I've won a victory.

"You don't know anything about when was the last time I've sweated." I have no clue why I'm having this conversation with him. I find myself doing things that I wouldn't normally do when I'm around Fitz.

"I bet I do, I bet the last time was before Tommy was born."

"For all you know I could have sweated recently with Alexander." His jaw flexes almost involuntarily and I smile at my small victory.

"I know that you haven't because last night you left too soon to have done any sweating."

"Fitzgerald you are having one of my agents report back to you." I don't know why I'm surprised because I knew he'd do that, but I am still shocked by his ridiculous behavior and a little flattered. I turn back around and start making my way up the stairs.

"Melody you knew I was going to do that don't act shocked." He says in a teasing tone.

Mellie laughs and the melodic lilt of it bounces off the walls and caresses my ears. I watch her walk up the stairs admiring and appreciating her form. A smile spreads across my face. I was preparing myself to pull away, but I can't. I can't and I won't just let him or any man have her without a fight.


	4. Chapter 4

A/N I was good and bored waiting on take out to arrive so I decided to put this little chapter together.

Two Weeks Later

She's still dating him and no matter how much I try to interfere, no interfere isn't the right word. No matter how much I try to... ok I'm interfering I will be honest. I've integrated myself in her life as much as possible even in times when I shouldn't have been. I need Mellie to understand how much I love her, how much I need her and I don't want to live my life without her. I need her to be honest with herself about how much she loves me and needs me. That's not me being arrogant that's me being real.

I hate these fundraising functions and while I'm glad Mellie is here tonight I am not happy she brought him. I haven't had a moment alone with her all night. He's been all up in her shit, walking around with his hand on her lower back guiding her around like she doesn't know where to go. I bite the inside of my jaw trying to stop the anger that is flowing through every cell. My eyes cut to the left after I hear her laugh. I see him whisper something in her ear. My eyes squint as I swear I see his lips caress the tip of her ear.

"Mr. President it's such an honor to meet you." A soft voice takes my attention away from Mellie and I turn to look into bright green eyes. Amber as I come to find out is her name is a beautiful young woman with long flowing red hair and a long lean body. Not really my type, I like my women curvy, but when I notice out the corner of my eye that I've caught the attention of Mellie I smirk to myself. Two can play this game. Suddenly Amber becomes the most interesting person in the room. Her jokes are hilarious and her conversation is riveting. I hear a clearing of a voice and I turn to look into Mellie's bright sparkling eyes. I can't quite read her.

"Mellie Grant." She extends her hand to Amber. I swear she stresses the Grant. I try to suppress a smile, she's jealous.

"Ms. Grant it's nice to meet you." I can see Mellie isn't happy when she is referred to as Ms. instead of Mrs. Well that was her doing.

"Yes I'm sure." I turn my head to stifle the laugh that was threatening to bubble up out of me. Amber excuses herself and I start to chuckle.

"The green eyed monster has reared her beautiful head." I state leaning down close to her ear.

"She looked to be only a few years older than Karen I was just trying to stop you from embarrassing yourself."

"Oh is that what that was? Well thank you for saving me from myself." She huffs and stalks off. I can't help, but to laugh heartily in her wake.

I'm upset with myself that I'm jealous. I saw him with that much younger woman and I instantly became territorial and wanted to show her he was mine, but he's not. Alexander is amazing and I need to stop letting Fitz interfere and give him a chance.

Alexander and I are in the car and I tell the driver to take us to his place. He looks at me surprised. I just smile at him. We exit the car and go into his place. The door is barely closed before he grabs my body to his.

"I want you so badly." He kisses down my neck, his hands begin to slowly pull my dress up and he grips my thigh. I feel the warmth start to spread between my legs. Alexander disengages from my neck and grabs my hand, leading me to his bedroom. He slowly undresses me and makes me feel like a precious gift being unwrapped the way he takes his time. "Beautiful" He breaths once I am left in only my underwear. I am momentarily insecure about my body. No one has seen it since I gave birth to Tommy. I work on removing his clothes. He is long and sinewy. He only has sparse hair on his chest and is not as muscular as Fitz. I shake my head to clear any thoughts of him. Alexander picks me up and lays me on his bed.

He hovers over me and begins to kiss down my body. I lay in anticipation of feeling his lips on my most sensitive parts. He pulls my underwear off and gently bites my inner thigh. I squirm waiting to feel his soft kisses. I shift myself closer to his mouth but he moves away. He then begins to kiss up my body. I'm confused, but I try to go with the flow. Alexander removes my bra and then his boxers. He reaches over to his nightstand and produces a condom. He rolls it on, I open my legs and he eases himself into me. He begins a slow rhythm.

"Alexander you feel so good." I breath and he does. He continues to stroke me. "Baby a little harder." He doesn't say anything. His eyes are closed tightly and he continues with his slow stroking. I begin to move my hips against his and I squeeze his hardness. He groans, it's the first noise he's made since we began. He opens his eyes and looks down at me. I stare at him and stroke his face, but he closes his eyes again and bites his lower lip. His movements begin to pick up as I wrap my legs around him, pushing my pelvis close to him trying to get the friction from his pelvic bone on my clit. I start to feel the familiar tingle and my hips pick up speed against him. He groans loudly as he starts to thrust into me harder. I work to meet each thrust, finally he stills his motions and moans. He drops his head into the crook of my neck to catch his breath. It can't be over surely he did not...

"Babe that was fucking fantastic. You are amazing." He kisses me before sliding off my body and onto his back. I sit up in bed and just stare at him. He is laying with his eyes closed and a smile on his face. Alexander sits up in bed and I figure this is when he's going to get me off. He moves to the side of his bed and removes his condom before throwing it in the garbage and laying back down. I hear his soft snores after about five minutes. I can't stop staring at him, I'm not at all happy right now. I climb over his body and grab my clothes before going into the bathroom to freshen up. When I finish dressing I come back into the room and he has pulled a blanket over his body and is out like a light. I shake my head and move toward the door so I can leave.

"How long was she up there?" I clinch my teeth as I get a report from Mellie's agent apparently she was in Alexander's house for an extended amount of time and I can guess what went down. I have no right to be furious, but that doesn't mean I'm not. I slam the glass of Scotch down onto the table. It takes everything in me not to go over to her place and confront her, but I know that won't accomplish anything so I sit back and try to calm myself down before I do something I shouldn't.


	5. Chapter 5

A/N Couldn't type out too long of a chapter tonight. I have a recurring bout of tendinitis that's flaring up again. Hopefully this tides you all over for a bit.

I have to go over to Mellie's today. I've been out of town and thankfully I haven't had to see her, but it's Tommy's birthday and she's hosting a small get together at her house for him. Of course I wouldn't miss it not even for Mellie and Alexander. I reach Mellie's house and I don't feel comfortable using my key. I ring the bell and wait for her to let me in. She opens the door looking surprised.

"Did you lose your key?" She kisses me on the cheek and steps aside.

"No." I state simply.

"You left it at home?" I turn to her and despite my best efforts I feel anger towards her.

"No, Mellie I have the key. I just didn't feel comfortable using it." I'm confused by his statement.

"Why not?" He takes a deep breath and smiles wearily.

"I didn't want to interrupt anything." He states before turning from me and heading towards the kitchen. I am hot on his heels.

"You didn't want to interrupt anything?" He turns to me surprised by my statement.

"Yeah just what I said. I know you and Alexander are all hot and heavy and I can do without walking in on that." Suddenly it was very clear to me what the problem was.

"Maybe if you didn't have agents snooping in on my private life you wouldn't find out things you don't want to know." He slammed his fist down on the counter and turned to me with eyes blazing.

"If you weren't fucking someone you shouldn't be fucking we wouldn't be having this problem." I recoil at his anger and then scoff.

"I'm single Fitzgerald. I can make love with whomever I choose."

"Make love? Are you fucking kidding me Mellie? No one loves you like I do! No one could ever make love to you unless it's me!."

"Fitz I don't want to argue with you. This is really ridiculous. I'm a single woman and you have no right to be angry with me."

"I'll never be ok with you being with him or anyone else."

"That's not my problem." I'm shocked by her blasé attitude towards my discomfort.

"We'll see about that."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"I'll never let him have you Mellie, not without a fight."

"This is not your call Fitz. Just stop ok. I'm happy why can't you be happy for me?" Before I can answer Tommy comes running into the kitchen, Mellie and I put on our happy faces for the sake of our son.

The party comes to a close and I am relieved that Alexander didn't show his face. Tommy is sitting in my lap completely knocked out. Teddy is bouncing around clearly on a sugar high. I expect him to crash at any moment. Mellie returns to the backyard after letting the last guests out. I hear her sigh.

"I was planning on giving him a bath." I look down at our sleeping son.

"Looks like that won't be happening." I stand with him in my arms.

"Yeah you can just go put him to bed." I put Tommy down and Mellie gets Teddy in the tub. When I walk into the bathroom she's sitting on the toilet watching him.

"We need to talk." She doesn't say anything. I can tell she was hoping I was going to let it go, but of course I never would. Mellie takes her time putting Teddy down for the night. I know she is stalling. When she finally walks into the living room I am sitting on the sofa waiting for her.

"What did you want to talk about?"

"Why are you doing this?"

"What am I doing Fitz?" I'm getting defensive even though I'm trying not to.

"You're dating him to spite me. If he meant so much to you and you were making a life with him he would have been here today, but I have a feeling you didn't invite him."

"Not everything is about you Fitz. I like Alexander he's a great guy and no I didn't invite him. I don't bring everyone I'm sleeping with around my kids." That stings, but I try to ignore it.

"You love me and I'm an awesome guy."

"That's debatable." I'm not sure what part she means.

"I'm not saying we need to get re-married right now, but we should date. Take things slowly."

"I appreciate what you are trying to do Fitz. I really do, but that ship has sailed. It's over between us." I didn't want to go here, but I have to pull out the big guns because I know Mellie so well.

"Sex isn't everything, but it's a big part of a relationship. If there's no sexual chemistry then what's the point?" I have no clue where he's going with all of this.

"Ok?"

"I can look at you and tell he isn't satisfying you." Despite my best efforts I can't keep the shock off my face. "I know you Mellie better than anyone. You do not have the look of a well fucked woman." I stand this conversation is over.

"You need to leave." He gives me a crooked smile before standing slowly from the sofa. He walks over to me and I have no clue what he's going to do, but I'm rooted in place. Fitz leans in and kisses my cheek. He moves his mouth to my ear and I can practically hear my heart thudding, I wonder if he hears it.

"You can't run from this Mellie or me." I close my eyes briefly before he pulls away. When he looks me in the eyes I have to lock my knees to keep from falling to the floor in a puddle. He gives me a hard look before walking out of the room. I hear the front door open and close behind him.

When he leaves I let out a long breath. I try to close my eyes and count to ten, but my body is hyperaware of everything. After a few breathing exercises I know I won't be getting to sleep tonight unless I do something about this tension. I am thankful that I purchased an extra pack of batteries for Tommy's gifts. I'm going to need to borrow a few tonight.


	6. Chapter 6

"Is there a reason you didn't invite me to Tommy's party?" I stop chewing and regard him. I remain silent so he continues. "We are building something here Mellie and I want to get to know your kids better."

"I don't think a birthday party is the place to do it."

"Why because he was there?" I know he is referring to Fitz.

"No because I'd first like to date you a little longer before brining you around my kids and secondly when I do make that move I'd like it to be a little more private." He takes a deep breath.

"I guess I don't have any other choice, but to wait until you are comfortable." He states with air quotes. I frown, but remain silent.

Alexander and I finish dinner and retire to the sofa. We start with just a few light kisses and things soon heat up. I pray this time is better than the last. Again he won't go down on me.

"Alex I'd love for you to taste me." He looks up from where he is kissing my neck.

"I don't do that." He goes back to my neck and I roll my eyes. I realize I wouldn't have had to ask Fitz. I close my eyes tightly trying not to think of him. Alexander slides into my heat and this time was much like the last. He closes his eyes and is completely silent. I can't do this again, I close my eyes and soon my mind drifts to Fitz.

_He kisses down my body making sure to pay close attention to my sensitive nipples. Fitz's tongue dips into my navel. I moan deeply. His finger slides into me and I clinch around him. _I am suddenly ripped from my fantasy.

"I can't believe how amazing you are." Alexander states as he climbs off of me. I lay on my back staring at the ceiling. "You staying the night?" He states as he leans over and kisses my collarbone.

"No I have to be home to get the kids from Fitz in the morning." I know that Fitz isn't dropping the kids off until mid-afternoon, but I don't care.

Next Day

Mellie was running on the treadmill when I appear in the doorway. I stand and just watch her until she notices my reflection in the window. She stops the treadmill and turns to me.

"Still not getting what you need eh?" Mellie dabs at the sweat on her forehead and rolls her eyes at me.

"Where are my kids?"

"Our kids are in the room playing." She tries to walk past me, but I lightly grab her arm. "When are you going to stop this?"

"I am so tired of having this conversation with you." She snatches her arm away from me and leaves the room to check in on the boys. I follow her.

"Did Karen call you?"

"Yes of course she did."

"We should plan a family thing." Mellie nods, but doesn't turn around. "Did you have anything in mind?"

"Nope I'll have to think about it." She says playing with Teddy and Tommy. She stands and turns to me.

"Can you watch them while I take a quick shower?"

"Yeah of course." Mellie leaves the room and goes to her bedroom.

I strip down and turn on the hot shower. My mind floats downstairs to my ex-husband, how delicious he looks in his polo shirt that hugs his pecs, his hair with flecks of grey in them. He was such a good looking man even after all these years. I step into the shower and let the hot water beat down over my body. I rub my hands down my body, grazing my hard nipples. I moan softly, my body coming alive. I lay my head against the tiled wall of the shower and try to slow down my fast beating heart, I have to get my body under control.

Fitz has taken the boys outside and is running around with them when I come back downstairs. He gives me a knowing look. Fitz knows that he is getting to me. He knows everything about me.

"Did you get yourself nice and clean?" I state smiling at her.

She just stands and stares at me.

"We should take Karen to a play. She's always loved the theater. We can do that just the three of us and then all of us can go to the arcade or something like that." I know that she is avoiding the elephant in the room.

"That sounds like a plan. I'm sure there's something that Karen would like to see." I just nod. We stand in awkward silence.

"I want the kids to meet Alexander. I think I'll take the opportunity to make that happen while Karen is in town." I can tell that he is not happy.

"I don't think so Mellie."

"Fitz there is no reason for them not to meet him. He's the man in my life. I want him to get to know the three most important people in my life." Fitz scratches the side of his face.

"I said no Mellie and if you remember from our divorce agreement you wanted us to both agree on bringing someone into the lives of our children and I don't agree. I'm sure you thought you were messing me up when you insisted on that." I smile sarcastically and shrug.

I stare at him with fire burning in my eyes, but I'm not entirely sure that the fire is anger only, even though I wouldn't admit that to Fitz. I know from his face that he's picked up on it. I stalk into the house. I watched her walk away a sly smile spreading across my face.


	7. Chapter 7

A/N Decided to take advantage of the pain free day with my wrist and get another chapter written. Thanks for the reviews I appreciate them.

"I had to see this for myself to believe it."

"See what honey?"

"You and dad actually getting along and not pretending." I laugh at Karen's statement.

"I told you that we've been fine since Tommy was born." Karen shrugs.

"Yeah I know, but I didn't necessarily believe you, but now I do." I kiss her forehead.

"Good honey, your father and I are friends." Karen nods.

"So what are we doing tonight?"

"We got tickets to _Wicked _in New York!" I'm about as excited as Karen. She shrieks and jumps up and down.

"I've been wanting to see that forever Mom!"

"I know baby. We got the babysitter for your brother's and it's going to be just you, your dad and me." Karen is beaming. "We have another surprise for you, but you'll have to wait until we get to New York."

We pack overnight bags and wait for Fitz to come over. We chartered a private jet to take us to New York for the night. Fitz arrives and we head off. I'm sitting in the back of the plane reading when he comes and sits next to me.

"What you up to?"

"Just reading." I hide the cover from him, I'm slightly embarrassed by what I'm reading. He notices and tries to look at the book.

"Why are you hiding it?" He states with a laugh in his voice.

"It's none of your business."

"What's with this none of my business stuff lately?" I'm half joking, half serious.

"It's not lately."

"Ever since you started dating him." Mellie rolls her eyes, but she's been secretive since he came into the picture.

"No that's not true Fitz, not at all, but there are certain things that you don't need to know. It's out of respect for my boyfriend." I nearly hurl on her at the mention that he's her boyfriend.

"Boyfriend that's a great term." I look at him surprised by his statement. "Because only a boy wouldn't be able to satisfy his woman." I should have known he'd have something snide to say.

"I never told you that he doesn't satisfy me."

"You don't have to with your mouth. Your body is telling me." He leans closer to me and I lean back. Suddenly he grabs the book from me and I reach for it, but he keeps it out of my reach.

"Fitzgerald give that back to me!" He holds a finger to his lips.

"Shhh you're going to wake Karen." I look over and see her laying down taking a nap.

"Fitz give that to me." He looks at the cover and starts to snicker.

"_Poor Little Bitch Girls_" He laughs. "Really Mellie? Now I know you aren't getting what you need if you're reading romance novels." I take the opportunity to snatch the book from him.

"I read Jackie Collins when I was married to you. Then I stopped when Andrew came along because I was preoccupied." I know I've hit a nerve when I see him clinch his jaw.

"So now that you aren't preoccupied you're reading them." He smiles smugly at me. Shit.

Mellie falls back into her seat and ignores me for the remainder of the trip. I know she isn't really upset with me just a little annoyed that I know her secret and pointed it out.

We go to a matinee performance of _Wicked_ before heading to Karen's next surprise. When we pull in front of _Serendipity, _Karen is bouncing up and down like a three year old, which makes Fitz and I happy.

"You surprised?"

"Yes I've wanted to come here for so long." It's nice to see her genuinely happy. We've all had some rough years especially after Gerry died. I push those thoughts aside so I can have a good night with Karen and Fitz.

All three of us eat way more than we should and feel like we need to be rolled into the hotel. Karen goes to her room, Mellie and I know she wants to call her friends or maybe text whatever kids do these days. I walk behind Mellie as she heads to her room. She looks over her shoulder.

"Where do you think you're going?" I just smile at her. She stops walking and turns to me. "Go to your room Fitzgerald."

"Why do you always say my full name when you're trying to make me do something?" I state amused. "You know you aren't my mother right?" She scoffs and turns back around walking toward her room and I continue to follow her. I know she won't make a scene with our agents present. When she reaches her door one of her agents opens it for her and steps in before we are allowed to enter. When everything is secure they leave us alone.

"Fitz you really need to go."

"Why are you afraid to be alone with me?"

"I'm not afraid, it's just not appropriate."

"Because of your boyfriend." I state stressing the boy part. She rolls her eyes at me. I take a step closer to her and she takes a step back. I smile at her. I step closer to her again this time she remains rooted in place, I know she is trying to act like I don't affect her. "Why won't you let me... pleasure you?" I say softly , standing right in front of her.

I shiver despite myself. I feel my nipples harden and the warm flush between my legs. I need to get him out of here.

"I'll see you in the morning Fitz." I back up and he comes closer again. I know that I am against the wall and have nowhere to run now. He presses his body to mine. He stares down at me. My heart is thudding in my chest.

"Mellie you didn't answer my question." I close my eyes trying to get control over my body. When I look back at him his eyes have turned to a stormy grey, his masculine scent hypnotizing me and I feel myself leaning in. My phone starts to ring and the trance is broken. I push Fitz away and rush to my phone. I hear him mutter a curse. I look at the caller ID and see that it is Alexander.

"Hey babe." I turn and look at Fitz and he rolls his eyes and walks toward the door. "Yes I miss you too." He half sneers at me before leaving the room. I say a silent prayer that Alexander called because that was a close one.

Karen and I wait in the lobby for Fitz to arrive. He's five minutes late which is unusual for him. Finally he comes down. Fitz kisses Karen, but only gives me a curt good morning. Before we head back to D.C. the three of us grab breakfast. He is quiet most of the time and Karen keeps looking between the two of us. I just shrug . I can guess what is wrong with him, but I don't want to get into it.

"So mom when am I going to meet Alexander?" I see Fitz's nose flare at the mention of Alexander.

"I don't know yet."

"What's the big deal you've been dating for awhile now, I want to meet him."

"Not right now Karen." I speak up. Karen opens her mouth, but then closes it realizing this isn't up for debate.

The plane ride back to D.C. is quiet and tense. This is the most tension Mellie and I have experienced since our divorce. I know she isn't completely happy with Alexander and I just can't understand why she won't give me another chance. I realize that I hurt her while we were married, but I've changed and seen the error of my ways. We finally get back to D.C. and I say goodbye to Karen. I'm about to get back into the car when Mellie stops me.

"I thought we were going to all go out?"

"I'll be back." She walks over to me.

"Are you upset with me?"

"No Mellie, I'm frustrated." She looks at me confused. "I know he doesn't make you happy and I'm not just talking about sex. There's no sparkle in your eyes, you're just going through the motions. At least with Andrew you looked happy."

"Are you telling me I should be dating Andrew?" She states sarcastically.

"I'll see you later." I turn to leave, but she grabs my arm.

"I don't want to do this Fitz. We've been on such good terms let's keep it that way."

"I'm trying here, but I don't want you with him."

"If you had the perception that I was happy and you saw this so called sparkle in my eyes would you be happy for me?"

"Honestly I would be happy for you Mellie. I'd be hurt and disappointed that we couldn't be together, but happy for you yes. All I want is your happiness and this is not the guy to give it to you."

"But you are?"

"Yes I am." I smile sarcastically at Fitz.

"You had twenty plus years to do that and what did you do with it?" I hate bringing up the past, but he needs to be brought back to earth.

"I pissed it away. I fucked up and I took you for granted. I refused to see how amazing you were, how much I loved you until it was too late and I have kicked myself every day because of it. I'm not that selfish asshole anymore. I'm ready to be the man you deserve if you'd just give me a chance to love you, cherish you, worship you." He says the last party quietly. My heart skips a beat.

"I'm with Alex now." Is all I can say before the emotions start to overtake me. I turn and walk back into the house not turning around again.


	8. Chapter 8

A/N: So basically I'm procrastinating doing my real work so you guys score with another chapter.

"How was Karen's visit?"

"Really good actually."

"Yeah I noticed."

"What?" He holds up the newspaper he's reading and on the front cover is me and Fitz having dinner at Serendipity with the headline _A Presidential Affair?. _"That's silly they totally cut Karen out of the pic.

"Does it matter? He's feeding you and you look happy that he is."

"I wanted to try his sundae that's all."

"Really Mellie you're just going to dismiss this and act like it's absolutely normal? If this were me and my ex how would you feel?"

"I'd trust you, unlike what you're doing with me. Fitz and I are over."

"You mouth says that, but does your heart believe it."

"What the fuck is wrong with you Alexander?"

"Why is he always around? Why do you have dinner with him every week?"

"We have kids together, two small kids that need to understand that their parents are a cohesive unit. And even though Karen is older she also deserves to have parents who are stable and get along."

"All I hear is excuses." I stand up abruptly done with this conversation.

"I have better places to be than to sit here and get accused of something I'm not doing." He jumps up.

"Mels I'm sorry." I recoil when he calls me Mels.

"Please don't call me that."

"Sorry Mellie." He grabs my hand and pulls me into his body. "I don't want to lose you. I love you." My eyes widen. I don't know what to say. He releases me and looks me in the eyes. "I just said I love you." I stand quiet still wide eyed. "Wow ok I guess you don't feel the same."

"By love me what do you mean? In love with me?" He takes a deep breath and shakes his head. This isn't going well, he wants more from me than I can give.

"Let's just put all this behind us." He pulls me to him and hugs me tightly. I try to take deep breaths and relax into his embrace, but I can't. He runs his hands down my back and I know where this is leading and frankly I'm not in the mood, but I try to perk myself up and think that it will be better this time, maybe he was just nervous.

We end up in his bedroom and he lays me down on the bed. Before he gets on top I flip us over and straddle him. He immediately flips us back over. He undresses me and kisses me a few times. Before he is putting his condom on and getting on top of me. How can a grown man be this terrible in bed? He is about to enter me, but I stop him. I'm not at all aroused. He looks at me shocked.

"Sorry Mellie I know how it can be when a woman goes through menopause."

"Excuse me I'm not going through menopause and I doubt you know how it is." I want to tell him I'm not aroused because he's done nothing to get me aroused. He leans in and begins to kiss me. His tongue slides into my mouth as his hand rubs down my back. I close my eyes and all I can think of is the last time I was with Fitz. The night we conceived Tommy. Although we were angry with each other the sex was deliciously pleasurable. I feel the wetness pool between my thighs. "I'm ready." He seems pleased with himself not realizing Fitz did all the work.

Alexander pushes into me and I can't stop thinking about Fitz. How large he is and how he knows how to use what he has so expertly. I start to clinch around him and my nails dig into his back. All I see are Fitz's stormy blue eyes looking down at me, his downy chest hair caressing my breast. I feel myself getting close. My legs wrap around his back and I start to thrust against him. My orgasm is almost...there...

"Fuck me oh Fitz!" Alexander stills, my brain clears and I can't open my eyes. Did I just say that out loud? He pulls from within my body and climbs off of me. I open my eyes and sit up. When I do I see a pair of angry dark blue eyes staring back at me.

"What the fuck Mellie!" I don't know what to say.

"I'm sorry Alexander." I go to touch his arm but he snatches away and stands up, he grabs his boxers and throws them on.

"You just screamed out your ex-fucking husband's name for fucks sake and all you can say is sorry!"

"What do you want me to say? It slipped out because you brought him up earlier." Yep I blame him and I don't care. He shakes his head. I stand from the bed and begin to get dressed.

"You fucking him still?" Gosh I wish, but of course I don't say that.

"No I'm not."

"I'd heard rumors about you. That you fucked Andrew Nichols, but I thought to myself not Mellie Grant she's not like that." I stand staring at him not sure where he's going with this. "But you are aren't you? You are a slut that can't keep her legs closed to just one man. I mean look how fast you jumped into bed with me." I know he's angry and I get that, but he's not going to talk to me this way.

"Alexander maybe you should calm down before you say something you'll regret." I finish dressing and I put my shoes on preparing to leave to let him calm down.

"What could I possibly say that I might regret? Thank God I've been wearing a condom no telling what I would have gotten from you." I'm getting angry. I walk out of the bedroom into the living room to grab my purse. He is hot on my heels. "Don't walk away from me." He grabs my arm and I snatch away.

"Do you want to know why I was thinking about Fitz?" He stops talking and just stares. "Because you are a lousy fuck! Only way I could get wet was to think about him and seeing as I've slept with you a couple times and never orgasmed tonight I decided to try to get some for myself, since you can't fuck worth a damn I had to think about someone who could. Instead of calling me names and accusing me maybe you need to go somewhere and learn how to actually pleasure a woman and figure out how to stop blowing your load after only a minute!" I grab my purse and walk to the door leaving him standing stunned.

The phone rings and I know it's him. Frankly I'm not in the mood, but I snatch my cell off the nightstand.

"What?"

_"Good morning to you too."_

"What do you want Fitz?" He chuckles and that just annoys me further.

_"Just calling to plan our dinner for tonight." _

"Since when do you call me to plan dinner?"

_"I was just trying to see if you wanted anything special?" _I frown confused by him, but then I realize what today is. I sigh.

"No Fitz I don't want anything special. You know we aren't married anymore you don't have to do stuff for me on our former anniversary." My heart falls into my feet when she says our former anniversary.

_"Mels this will always be our anniversary whether we are married or not." _

"I'm sorry Fitz. I'm just tired I don't mean to come off like a bitch. I would love if you made your lasagna it's been a long time since I've had it." I can't keep the smile off my face.

_"How about I grab some of those cannoli's you like so much from Vaccaro's."_

"I will not turn that down." Despite myself I realize I'm smiling and feeling a bit better about the upcoming day.

I cancel all my appointments for the day so I can stay home and prepare for dinner tonight. Thankfully the boys like my lasagna too so I don't have to make a separate meal for them. I call Vaccaro's to make sure they will have fresh cannolis for me. I'm anxious for tonight. I know I shouldn't get my hopes up, but I can't help myself.

I'm just pulling the bread and lasagna out of the ovens when I hear the boys come running in. They barrel into the kitchen and nearly knock me down.

"Hey boys." I lift them both into the air.

"You're going to throw your back out doing that. You aren't as young as you used to be." She appears in the doorway, looking just as divinely beautiful as the day I met her. I walk over to her with Tommy and Teddy in my arms and kiss her on the cheek.

"Ewwww" They both say in chorus. Mellie and I laugh. Dinner is pretty quiet, Mellie likes to eat and doesn't like to be disturbed while she's doing so. We give the boys a bath and put them down for the night.

"Would you like to stay for a nightcap?" She thinks a moment and then agrees. We sit on the sofa, as we both sip on a glass of Scotch. "You ok?" I take a deep breath. I knew he was going to ask.

"I'm ok. Just tired." He nods I know he doesn't believe me. I drain the amber liquid and hold my glass out for him to refill it. He quirks his eyebrow up, but doesn't say anything as he pours me another glass. He drains his and pours himself another.

We sit in companionable silence both of us drinking way more than we should. The warm buzz starts to tingle through my body. I sigh as I look at him.

"I broke up with Alexander." I scrunch my face up when I hear the slurred words come out of my mouth. He turns to me and looks at me strangely.

"What happened?" I am genuinely curious. She shrugs and hesitates. I can see the wheels turning as she contemplates if she should tell me. I know it has something to do with me.

"I called your name out in bed." She says suddenly and I choke on the Scotch I'd just swallowed. She starts to laugh. I have no clue if it's because I choked or because she called my name out or both.

"I bet he was upset." I say with a laugh in my voice.

"Yeah he was." She shrugs. "He was just awful in bed." Fitz and I look at each other and bust out laughing.

"You want to know a secret?" He leans over towards me, his words starting to slur and I know the Scotch is getting to him. I nod yes.

"I called Sarah your name in bed, well specifically Mels." We look at each other and bust out laughing again.

"I got upset because Alexander called me Mels." Again we bust out laughing.

"We are a ridiculous pair you and I." I nod my head in agreement. The amount of Scotch I've consumed suddenly bears down on me. I lay my head back on the sofa and let my eyes flutter close.

"You should just stay here tonight."

"Mmmhmmm" Is all I can say. I'm suddenly so tired. I feel him stand from the sofa and hear his laugh getting further and further away. I can only guess he's walked out of the room. I'm nearly sleep when I feel him hoist me up off the sofa. "I told you that you're going to put your back out."

Mellie states before laying her head on my shoulder. My first thought is to put her in the guest bedroom, but I can't resist having her in my bed even if we just sleep. I lay her down on my bed and remove her shoes. I fight with myself whether or not I should take her jeans off. It's like she's reading my mind when glazed blue eyes slightly open.

"Don't even think about." I just smirk. Mellie pulls herself off the bed and stumbles into the bathroom where I hand her the top to my pajamas. I'm expecting her to go to the guest room when she comes out, but she doesn't. My top is barely covering her ass, her long creamy legs peeking out from underneath. I've changed into the bottoms and is lying in bed underneath the covers. Mellie stops by the bed and I'm prepared to tell her goodnight, she surprises me when she pulls the covers back and slips underneath. My eyebrows nearly shoot off my face. "We're going to have a wicked hangover in the morning." She's still slurring her speech. She lays her head on my chest and almost instantly I hear soft snoring, she's out. I smile and kiss her forehead before letting the alcohol take me to dream land.


	9. Chapter 9

A/N: So let me get this right... you all hated Alexander and is glad that he's gone? lol I loved the passionate reviews to the last chapter.

My eyes flutter open and the blinding light causes a piercing headache to start right away. I open my eyes a slit and I'm momentarily confused by my surroundings. I try to move, but I can't. I then look over to my right and Fitz is laying next to me with his arm thrown across my midsection. The previous night's events come rushing back to me and I can't contain a giggle. I hear him groan and he lift's his head. Even with bed hair and pillow creases on his face he's still devastatingly handsome.

"Good morning." His voice is sleep roughened and I just want to melt into the sheets.

"Morning." I smile at him. He lifts up and is right in my face. He smiles.

"I have a terrible hangover." He lays his head next to my face and we start laughing.

"Me too. Why did we do that last night?"

"I have no idea." He says with his face partially in the pillow. I move to my side and face him. I can't help running my fingers through his sleep tossed curls. He looks up at me and stares into my eyes. My heart starts to beat faster as I feel myself being pulled to him seemingly involuntarily. Our lips are inches from each other, I'm anticipating feeling his firm soft lips against mine.

"Daddy!" We pull apart when Teddy and Tommy come running into the room. They jump on the bed.

"Mommy what are you doing here?" Teddy asks climbing on top of Fitz.

"Mommy was too sleepy to go home last night." That answer seems to satisfy his curiosity. Tommy gets underneath the covers and snuggles against me. He's definitely a mama's boy.

"Mommy are you going to stay here and play with us?" Tommy asks looking into my eyes, he looks so much like his father.

"No sweetie you will spend the day with your dad." He pouts and I can tell Mellie will give in and I can't be happier. "If it's ok with your dad I'll stay a little while." Tommy looks over at me.

"Oh yeah it's ok with me." Mellie rolls her eyes, but I see a ghost of a smile on her face.

I get the boys dressed while Fitz makes breakfast. "I'm going to jump in the shower can you feed them." He nods and I walk away and head towards his bathroom. I'm deep in thought when the shower door opens and Fitz steps in. I look at him like he has another head growing out of his neck, he only smirks.

"What are you doing?"

"Conserving water."

"Did you leave the boys alone?"

"They are playing."

"They ate already?"

"No we decided to wait for you to get out of the shower." I step closer to Mellie. I am trying to keep my eyes focused squarely on her face, but I want to look south so badly. She doesn't move back when I step into her personal space. I keep my eyes on her as I dip my head...

"Mommy, Daddy!" Tommy is standing outside the shower crying.

"Fuck!"

"Fitz watch your mouth." Mellie opens the door slightly and pops her head out. "What's wrong sweetie?"

"Teddy pulled me hair." I don't want to be a terrible father, but I am immensely irritated with both my children.

"Ok tell Teddy I said don't do that otherwise he'll be in timeout." Tommy stops crying and seems happy with Mellie's response. He nods and runs back out of the bathroom. Mellie sticks her head back in the shower, but I know that the mood is broken.

Mellie spends the remainder of the day with us, but she is guarded with me.

"I need to get going." I just nod. She shuffles her feet nervously. "We can't do..." She stops talking and takes a breath. "Maybe we should stop doing these dinners." My heart drops.

"Why?" I'm having a difficult time containing my disappointment.

"Fitz please don't make this more difficult than it needs to be." She goes to walk away, but I can't let her walk away from me again. I pull her against me and capture her mouth in a heated kiss, my tongue slips past her lips and rubs against hers. Mellie's arms wrap around my neck and she tangles her fingers in my hair. I pull away from her and look deep into her eyes.

"You don't want to not see me Mellie, do you?" She slowly shakes her head.

I slowly walk to my car still bewildered by the kiss that Fitz gave me. I know that I'm playing with fire, but he just draws me to him like a moth to a flame. I groan inwardly at the cheesy cliché. I have just enough time to go home and change before my appointment.

"Do you still love him?" I take a deep breath.

"Yes despite everything he's done and despite how hard I try not to I love him with everything I am."

"Why do you resist going back to him?"

"I don't trust him with my heart." It may seem silly, but it's the truth.

"You don't believe him when he tells you that he's changed."

"No, I just keep waiting for the other shoe to drop. For me to not be enough again."

"So Mellie this seems more like an issue with you feeling inadequate than you not trusting Fitz."

"My husband cheated on me for years, my lover cheated on me. Obviously there is something wrong with me. Who wouldn't feel inadequate?" I laugh trying to lighten the mood.

"Is this a product of the rape?" It always comes back to that.

"I never felt this way before I was raped. I felt that I was the best thing since sliced bread. And then one night stripped away everything I thought I was. I've had to reinvent myself just to...survive."

"Have you ever really expressed yourself to Fitz?"

"We've been in therapy before. He'll just try to fix me so that I'll come back to him."

"Do you not understand why he wants you?" I look at her shocked that she's put into words what I've been thinking.

"I haven't been a very nice person. I don't understand why he still loves me and if I can't understand why then he must be lying to me." My voice breaks and I look away.

"You don't think you deserve his love?" I shake my head no.

"Even though his infidelities hurt me I felt... I feel like I deserved it. When will I get to be the Mellie I was before, it happened?"

"Mellie you'll never be the same person you were before you were raped. That was a profound tragedy. Along with the fact that time happened and none of us are the same after the ravishes of time passing."I nod knowing she is right.

"I want so badly just to fall back in his arms."

"Take it slow. I would not suggest you fall back into his arms or his bed, but I can see in your eyes that you yearn to be with him again. Perhaps you should date."

Dr. Jenson's words echo in my head. I only call Fitz to check in on the boys, we don't discuss us. I'm nervously pacing the floor when he comes in with the boys. They run to me and I hug them tightly.

"Here's their bags." He hands them to me. "I should get going."

"Hey can you stay for a bit I need to talk to you?" I nod and go to the den to wait on Mellie. She gets the boys settled in their room and comes looking for me. I can tell she's nervous. I've thought a lot about our kiss and how she basically shut me out afterwards, it was disheartening.

"What did you want to talk about?" She takes a deep breath. She sits in the chair across from the sofa where I am seated.

"Would you like to..." I sit up on the sofa a little straighter. "Would you like to go to dinner with me this weekend?"

"Are you asking me out on a date?" I'm trying not to get too excited, but I may be doing a bit of a happy dance on the inside.

"Yes I am asking you out on a date." I smile so hard my face feels like it's going to break.

"I would love to go out on a date with you Melody." She blushes and looks away.

"Good I'll call Hayley and arrange for her to watch the boys."

"So where are we going?"

"It's a surprise." I like this side of Mellie.

"Ok well I'll see you Saturday." It's Thursday and I have a few speeches to give on Friday, but Saturday seems so far away. We both stand and she walks me to the door. I turn and give her a light kiss on the cheek. When I pull away she's smiling shyly at me. "You've made me a very happy man, you won't regret taking this step." I say softly to her and I mean it. She nods and smiles again. I love her smile. We say our goodbyes it takes all I have not to skip to my waiting car.


	10. Chapter 10

A/N I think this is one of the moments you all have been waiting for, as for the other well that's still to come (no pun intended).

I've looked in my mirror probably twenty times in the last five minutes. I'm just not sure about what I have on. I inspect myself once more, nervously smoothing out imaginary wrinkles. I feel like my outfit just isn't good enough. Finally I blow a breath out frustrated with myself and the situation. It's not like I haven't done this before, I've done this a hundred times if I've done it three times. I step closer to the mirror noticing what I think is a new grey hair at my temple. I'm getting old...no scratch that I've gotten old. I step away from the mirror and give myself one last once over, I take a quick glance at my watch and realize she'll be here soon. Mellie wanted to come by and pick me up, our destination is still a mystery to me although she told me to dress casual.

I look at the polo and khaki pants one last time, taking another glance at my watch I know I don't have time to change. The doorbell rings and saves me from my self deprecation session. I stride nervously to the door, I hope that she likes what I have on. I stop in my tracks, why is Mellie ringing the doorbell she has a key? I continue to the door and look through the peephole it is in fact Mellie. I open the door. She looks gorgeous in a floral sun dress and sandals. I feel better about what I'm wearing.

"Why didn't you use your key?"

"I didn't think it was appropriate to barge in your house on our first date." She states with a smile. I laugh lightly.

"You look gorgeous." I move in to kiss her, but she moves away.

"Thank you, but I don't kiss on the first date." The sparkle in her eyes causes a flutter in my stomach.

"We'll see about that." I retort playfully. "So where are we going?"

"You'll see. You look very handsome tonight Fitz."

"Thank you I wasn't sure if what I have on was right."

"It's right." We head to our mystery destination. Mellie and I chat aimlessly about everything and nothing at all. I sneak peeks out the window to determine if I can figure out where we're going, I can't.

"Just relax and stop trying to figure out where we're going." I laugh lightly. It's like she read my mind.

"Ok." I settle back, just enjoying her company. Before I realize it the car stops and I turn and look out the window. A huge smile spreads across my face. I turn to her and see her looking expectantly. "You remembered?" I say astonished.

"Of course I did. Do you remember what today is?" He nods and smiles even bigger.

"I didn't think you remembered."

"Yes Fitz I remember that this is the day we went on our first date." He grabs my hands and looks me in the eye.

"You are amazing." I bow my head trying not to let the emotions overtake me. "I rented the place out." I look back up at Fitz and I can tell he's fighting to control his emotions. The agent comes around to open the door for us. Fitz reluctantly releases my hand and steps out. He turns quickly to grab my hand again to help me out the car. He starts off, but I stop him and turn. The agent hands me a picnic basket and if it were possible he smiles even bigger. We walk hand in hand towards the entrance of the Miniature Golf facility. Fitz and I spent our first date at a Miniature Golf place and had a picnic.

We eat and then play a couple rounds of golf. We have laughed so much my sides hurt. We're both terrible, but we're having too much fun to care. Fitz and I flop down on the bench exhausted over a round of laughter after he hits the ball too hard and it goes flying over the fence.

"I guess I hit that a little too hard."

"You think?" We giggle, enjoying each other's company immensely.

"Gosh we suck at this. I don't recall us being this bad before." I look at me like seriously.

"Fitz we haven't played in over twenty years." I shake my head she has a point.

"I don't want to lose sight of us and our relationship with each other ever again." I get serious for a moment and turn to her looking her in the eyes.

"Neither do I." Mellie states softly. We just sit and stare at each other. I want to kiss her so badly, but I make no move.

"Just kiss me already Fitzgerald." I grab her and pull her to me, not giving her a chance to change her mind. My mouth moves over her soft firm lips. My tongue slides into her mouth tasting the sweetness of her mouth. My hand roams up her back and down to her ass where I squeeze it lightly. Mellie wraps her arms around my neck and pulls me even closer. Her phone starts to ring and she pulls away from me. Mellie takes a glance at her phone and then turns back to me. She has a strange look on her face.

"Who is it?" She shifts in her seat.

"Alexander." My eyebrows quirk up.

"You aren't going to answer it?"

"For what?" I shrug trying to appear casual.

"To tell him you're on a date with me." A smile tugs at the corners of her mouth.

"You are so petty." I'm having a difficult time keeping the laughter out of my voice. He shrugs trying to appear innocent.

"Well he left an opening for me and I won't squander this opportunity again." I scoot closer to him.

"Show me again how you won't be squandering this opportunity." My voice is low and I can see the small shiver run through him, his pupils dilate. Before he can react I lean in and suck his bottom lip into my mouth. My fingers tangle in his curls. I have to remember to tell him I like his hair this length. Fitz presses himself tightly to me. My leg comes up and wraps around his waist, his hand rests on my thigh. The wind blows and ruffles my hair and I am reminded where we are. I pull back.

"Fitz we should stop, I don't want to be on the front cover some tabloid in my skivvies."

"There's no one here, but us." I pull back and look at him.

"Fitz there is always someone besides us you know that." He lays his forehead against mine.

"I know." He says exasperated. "Ok maybe we should head back to your place.

"Nice try." I pull back and give her my best innocent look.

"What?" She 's staring at me.

"I'm going back to my place after we drop you off at home." When I poke my bottom lip out she laughs loudly before leaning in and lightly tugging on it with her teeth. Mellie scrambles off the bench when I try to grab her.

"You are such a tease." I say smacking her ass. She yelps, but keeps laughing and I soon join her. She wraps her arm around mine and we walk back to the car, enjoying the warm breeze and the beautiful star lit sky. "I had an amazing time tonight Mellie. Thank you for allowing me this do over."

"I had a great time too Fitz. I'm not just doing this for you I'm doing it for me too. I still love you and if I don't at least try to make this work again I'll always be wondering what if."

"I love you too Mellie, we will make it this time. We know what it's like to live without each other and I think I can speak for the both of us and say it's not very pleasant." She nods in agreement.

"I just pray you don't hurt me again." I hate what I've done to her, what my infidelities have done to her.

"I will treat you like the queen that you are." Fitz and I enter the car and despite myself I am hopeful and buoyed by his words. I snuggle closer to him and lay my head on his shoulder. He wraps his arm around me before kissing the top of my head.

I'm going to do this right this time, treat her like she deserves to be treated. I silently say a prayer of thanks that I'm getting another chance with this amazing woman.


	11. Chapter 11

Mellie and I have been dating for two weeks now. We're taking things slow...very slow. I'm trying to be patient, but I want her... in the worse way. I'm trying to keep my mind away from those sorts of thoughts, but I can't help it she's so beautiful, so sexy. I've been reminded over and over why I fell so madly in love with her in the first place.

Fitz and I have been dating for two week now. We've decided to take things slow. Well I decided to take things slow and now I'm wondering exactly what I was thinking. I want him with a burning passion that threatens to consume me. I want to take our relationship to the next step, but honestly I am apprehensive. I can't help feeling that once again I'm somehow not going to be enough for him. I sigh knowing I have to put those thoughts aside, Fitz and I are attending a charity ball tonight. It will be the first time that we make an appearance together since we divorced five years ago.

I look at myself in the mirror wondering if I should change into another gown. I know he loves me in dark blue, he's always said the color brought out my eyes. I smooth the dress, it hugs my hips and shows just enough cleavage without being trashy.

"Stunning." Fitz appears behind me and wraps his arms around my waist, before kissing my exposed shoulder.

"Thank you." I turn in his arms and straighten out his bow tie. He's never been able to tie it straight. He pecks my lips and holds me close to him. I feel the heat rising between us, I step out of his embrace. I give him a once over, he twirls around I can't help but to giggle.

"How do I look?"

"You look amazing, but I'm sure you know that." He pulls me back into his arms and kisses me deeply. My hands rise to his chest and I'm about to push away from him, but the ripple of his muscles underneath his tux stops me. My mouth opens and he slips his tongue into my mouth. And I can't help a moan that escapes my mouth. Fitz's hands move lower until he cups my butt. He pulls away from my mouth.

"How about we skip this thing tonight?" He whispers hotly into my ear.

Mellie shakes her head in the negative and I blow out a breath.

"It was worth a try huh?"

"Yes you never know unless you try." She pushes away from me and I reluctantly let her go. "We should get going." I take a glance at my watch and nod my head in agreement.

I love the dress Mellie has on, but I hate the fact that every other man and some women seem to love it too. My hand is at the small of her back the entire night, I haven't let her out of my sight. We greet Senator Haywood and I notice that he hugs her a little too long, a little too close and his hands go a little too low. When he finally pulls back from her I give him a warning look. He clears his throat before excusing himself.

"Are you going to spend the night glaring at any man that comes near?"

"Yes." I say unashamedly. A slow song finally plays and I'm about to ask her to dance when I hear a familiar voice behind me asking her for a dance. Mellie looks at me, not sure what to do. My jaw flexes, but I don't want to cause a scene. I tip my head slightly letting her know it's ok. He leads her onto the dance floor and I watch from the sidelines with my eyes narrowed in slits.

Every time he tries to pull me closer I push him back subtly.

"I was shocked to hear that you and Fitz were seeing each other again." Andrew spits the statement out like the words taste like a bitter poison.

"Probably not as shocked as I was, but I love him and he's really changed." He huffs and rolls his eyes.

"And you believe that?" I'm not in the mood to have this conversation with him here, I not in the mood to have this conversation with him anywhere.

"I know Fitz. I know when he's sincere and I know when he's lying." He laughs sarcastically. The song finally mercifully ends and I move out of his arms like he's burned me. Fitz is by my side instantly.

"I can take over from here Andrew." I note the hard edge to his voice. Apparently he hasn't gotten over my brief affair with Andrew. I smile slightly at how jealous he is, I like it. Another song begins to play and Fitz pulls me into his embrace. We sway in tune with the music and each other's body. His left hand rests low on my back, while his right lightly caresses the exposed skin of my shoulder. "What did he say to you?"

"Just that he was shocked about us dating again."

"I hate that asshole." I pull back shocked by the anger in his voice.

"Fitz it's been over between Andrew and I."

"It should have never started." He pulls me closer to him. When the music stops he is slow to release me. "I'm ready to go." He leans down and whispers into my ear, I know he's annoyed.

"Ok we can go." Fitz and I leave the ball. He is silently brooding in the corner of the limo on the way back to my house. I look over at him and shake my head slightly.

"Why are you upset?" He looks at me like he forgot I was in the car with him.

"I'm not." He states simply before turning to look out the window again. I sit back and remain silent for the rest of the ride. When he's being insolent there is no use in trying to talk to him.

We arrive at Mellie's and I don't mean to be rude or angry, but I'm annoyed with having her ex-lover thrown in my face. It's not Mellie's fault and I certainly wasn't an innocent party in our marriage, but that doesn't stop my jealous streak. The agent opens the door and Mellie steps out. I remain seated. She bends down and looks in the car.

"You aren't coming in?" I look at her shocked by her question.

"Do you want me to?"

"You can for a bit." I laugh acerbically and shake my head.

"That's not what I asked you." Mellie looks at me confounded.

"Yes I want you to Fitz." I exit the vehicle and follow Mellie into the house. We relieve Hayley and check in on the boys before heading to the living room. She turns when we reach the living room. "Do you want a drink?"

"No." I remove my jacket and sit on the couch, she comes and sits next to me. Mellie runs her fingers through my hair and I look at her wondering what's this all about.

"What's wrong sweetie?" She kicks off her shoes and tucks her legs underneath her body, I follow her every move with my eyes.

"Seeing you with Andrew just didn't sit well with me. Along with the fact that just about every man in the place was drooling over you."

"Are you jealous?"

"Yes." Mellie leans in closer to me.

"You have no reason to be. I'm yours." I'm stunned by her words.

"Are you?"

"Yes." I'm perplexed by his question. He turns to me fully, our faces are mere inches apart.

"You haven't given your entire self to me." I lean into him and capture his mouth. Fitz's hands instantly tangle in my hair, before sliding down my body to my waist. He pulls me onto his lap. My dress is bunched around my waist as I straddle his lap. Fitz's strong hands grip my thighs. I grind myself into his growing bulge. I pull my mouth away from his.

"We should go upstairs." He nods and stands with me still in his arms. I wrap my legs tightly around him as he walks up the stairs. Fitz and I frantically remove each other's clothes until we are left in only our underwear. He kisses down my body, he moves to his knees and kisses my stomach before dipping his tongue into my navel, before he can go lower the door bell rings. He looks up at me and I shrug. Fitz stands with an annoyed look on his face.

"Who the fuck is that?"

"I have no clue, maybe it's one of the agents needing us." He rolls his eyes.

"I'll go check." He walks out of the bedroom in just his boxers.

This better be good I think as I head downstairs. I open the door and I can't keep the shock off my face when I see his face, but I can safely say that he's more shocked to see me. I smirk and turn.

"Mellie, Alexander is here to see you!" He stands with his mouth slightly open, the hand holding the flowers I guess he planned to give Mellie, falls by his side. Mellie comes down the stairs in her robe.

"Alexander what are you doing here?" He looks from Mellie to me before speaking.

"Foolishly I thought that maybe I'd misjudged you and the entire situation, but I guess I was wrong. You are the slut I thought you were." Fitz takes a step towards him and thankfully my reflexes are quick enough to slow his progress before an agent comes and steps in between the two men.

The agent tells him it's time to go. Fitz is clenching his jaw so tightly I'm afraid he's going to break it or at the least crack a few teeth. Fitz eyes Alexander the entire time. His silence is worrying. Fitz is like a quiet storm when he's truly angry and that's when he's at his most destructive. Cyrus once described it as "ticking" which aptly describes his mood right now. I pat his chest.

"It's ok let's go inside. He steps back from the door and I thank the agent before closing the door. We stand in the foyer staring at each other.

"I thought you broke up with him." His voice has a hard edge to it.

"I did."

"Then why was he here tonight?" I move my head to the side and regard him. I look back at the door, was he not just standing there and heard the entire exchange?

"He obviously was trying to reconcile with me."

"Have you been talking to him?" His eyes are cold as he stares at me.

"No I haven't, he's called several times, but I don't answer."

"You didn't tell me that." I take a step back

"If you're accusing me of something just say it." I snap out of my angry trance and look at Mellie through clear vision, not one clouded with fury.

"I'm sorry. I'm not accusing you of anything. I'm just thrown off by the fact that I had to see both Alexander and Andrew tonight." Mellie steps closer to me and kisses my exposed chest.

"I only want you Fitz." I'm surprised by how insecure I am when it comes to Mellie. I look down into her sparkling blue eyes and I know she is being sincere, but I just keep waiting for her to realize that I'm not good enough for her.

"Let's go to bed, I'm tired." She nods and we head back upstairs. As much as I want Mellie tonight is not the right time, I wouldn't be with her just because I love and adore her, but also because I'd be trying to assuage some of my insecurities as a man. She deserves more, so much more. I can tell from her eyes, that she understands. We walk upstairs hand in hand. When we reach the bedroom, I slip underneath the covers. Mellie goes to her closet to change into a nightgown, before coming in the room and getting in bed. She moves close to me and kisses me before laying her head on my chest. I hold her close to me as we drift off.


	12. Chapter 12

A/N You all are the greatest. I really love reading your reviews. I am usually left agreeing and laughing.

Fitz and I put the incidents with Andrew and Alexander behind us. It's not worth putting us off track. I've been tapped to get involved in the creation of the Fitzgerald Grant presidential library. Fitz is off to Switzerland for diplomatic talks. He's not president anymore, but he's often brought in to consult on sensitive foreign policy issues. Since we decided to try again we have not spent one day apart and very few nights apart even though we haven't taken it to the next level. It's going to be both weird and refreshing to have a few days to myself, to think, to clear my head.

Fitz has always been an overwhelming kind of guy. When he's with you he wants all of you and nothing else will suffice. I love him, God knows I do, but it will be nice to just take a breather. I'm sure after a day I'll be missing him like crazy though. I grab my belongs and put them in a bag, kissing the boys before I head out to a planning meeting for the library.

I love the role I play now that I'm no longer president, but now was not the time that I wanted to leave the country. I pull out my phone and look at picture of Mellie, the kids and myself that we took when Karen was home briefly a couple weeks ago. I run my finger over the screen, missing them all so much even though I've only been gone a day. I can't figure out how I spent so much time, how I wasted so much time with Mellie. She means the world to me and I know I've never loved the way I love her. I take a deep breath and put my phone away, I need to focus on the task at hand.

I'm walking towards the conference room where the meetings will be held when I see a familiar face. She turns and our eyes lock. I feel a flutter in my stomach, but I can't quite figure out why. I walk towards her and she stands unmoving. When I reach her I give her a light hug.

"Olivia I didn't expect to see you here."

"I was called in to help with the situation." I nod understanding , of course they would ask for her help. We chat aimlessly before heading in. Once we are in the room it's all business. I didn't fill Mellie in on what this was all about fully, not wanting her to worry. We have a hostage situation with some very important people involved and I've been called in to help with the negotiations. The American public can never know that the government does in fact negotiate with terrorist if the hostage is important enough.

The last few days have been exhilarating and exhausting. I was reluctant to help with the library planning, but now I'm excited and glad I joined. The boys have gone off for a play date so I decide to take the opportunity to go pamper myself at the spa. After my massage I'm sitting getting a pedicure, I pull my phone out and decide to check the news. There is an article in the _New York Times_ about Fitz's visit to Geneva. I smile so proud of him and all of his accomplishments, but that smile soon drops off my face. My stomach drops into my feet and a lump forms in my throat. I have to blink back the tears that are threatening to fall when I see a picture of him and Olivia Pope embracing.

I've tried to not think about her, to not think about the possibility of her coming back into our lives and him leaving me for her. Now I can no longer deny it. I put the phone back in my purse and close my eyes trying to enjoy my pedicure, but all the years of pain and disappointment threaten to suffocate me. I don't realize that I'm breathing heavily on the verge of a panic attack until my agent comes over to me and inquires if I'm ok. I can't speak I just nod my head, but decide to cut my session short and head home. Once I'm home I go up to my bedroom and lay on the bed, the tears start nearly immediately. I keep trying to stay positive, but he was so vague about what exactly the talks were about and I can't help but to think it was all so that he could meet up with her. It's not like he hasn't done it in the past.

Three Days Later

I'm in a hurry to get home. There's something wrong with Mellie and I bet I can guess what it is. I need to talk to her, let her know everything is ok. I didn't mention Olivia on the phone when I talked to her briefly. I'd only been able to talk to Mellie once since I arrived and when I did talk to her she was guarded and dry, not the sweet open and expressive Mellie that she'd been lately. The ice was threatening to form over her heart again and I know she is retreating within herself. I can't let it happen, I can't lose her again.

When I arrive back in D.C. I head straight to Mellie's house. She's in meeting for the library all day. I let Hayley leave so I can spend time with the boys, taking them out for ice cream while we wait for Mellie to come home. I cook dinner for the boys and give them baths. They are headed to bed when she finally arrives home. I walk over to her and hug her tightly to my body, she is stiff.

"I missed you so." She quickly moves away from me and goes to the boys.

"Are you two all ready for bed?" They nod frantically at their mom, smiling happy to see her. Mellie walks away from me and takes the boys to their bedroom. I sigh knowing I have a long night ahead of me. I walk to the kitchen and tidy up giving her time alone with the kids before they go to bed. When I'm done I sit in the living room and wait for her arrival. I look at my watch and furrow my brow, she's taking a long time to put the boys down.

I decide to go look for her. I peek in their room and they are asleep. I head towards the bedroom. I hear the shower running. She really is trying to avoid me, but I'm not going to let her. I sit in the large high back chair in the corner of the room and wait for her, she has to come out of that bathroom at some point.

I was surprised to see Fitz at my house, I'd have expected him to be off with Olivia, forgetting about me and our children. I know he's going to want to make excuses and empty promises, but I can't do this anymore. I can't have my heartbroken by him anymore. I'm hoping he'll get the hint and just leave me alone, although I know him well enough to know that won't happen. He'll want to talk, explain. I'll get angry, we'll argue, he'll run back to her and I'll be left alone...again. I'm always left alone.

I'm not surprised when I see him sitting in my bedroom. I just ignore him and walk into my closet to grab my night clothes. I take my time changing and of course he's still there.

"We need to talk."

"About what?" I see him flinch at my tone.

"Mellie don't do this."

"Do what Fitzgerald?" He stands and walks closer to me, but I step away. He stops and looks at me shocked.

"Mellie I didn't know she was going to be there. I just gave her a friendly hug that's all." I shake my head not wanting to hear his lies. I go to walk away, but he moves over to me quickly and grabs my arm. "Stop it!" I'm startled by his outburst. "Do not push me away! We're not doing this again Mellie, we've wasted too much time with these stupid ass games." Mellie snatches away from me.

"I'm sorry if my feelings are stupid." I take a deep breath and realize I can't let anger rule this conversation.

"They aren't Mellie, but you have to trust me. I didn't know she was going to be there. I saw her the first day of the talks, gave her a brief hug. We went into the talks and once we were done for the day I went back to the hotel alone." Mellie looks away and I can feel that she wants to believe me, as she should because I'm telling the truth.

"Why didn't you tell me over the phone that she was there? Why did I have to see a picture of you two hugging to know."

"Mellie I barely had a chance to talk to you. I wasn't interested or even thinking about Olivia." I want to believe him, but I've been hurt so badly by him so many times.

"Why were you there?"

"Two high level CIA operatives were captured in Damascus. It was a very delicate situation and I couldn't tell you all the details, hell I didn't even know all the details until I got there."

"Why did you have to hug her?" Mellie sounds lost and scared and I hate that I've done this to her.

"I was just trying to be friendly Mels, it literally meant nothing. I felt nothing. My main focus was to get in and out so I could get back to you." My words to Andrew ring in my head and I look him in the eyes and I know that he isn't lying to me. I also know that Fitz was never concerned about hiding his affair with Olivia from me. If he were doing something he'd be open about it.

"I'm sorry." He moves closer to me and holds his arms out. I melt into his embrace and cling to him.

"Don't apologize to me. This is all my fault. If I'd been a real man and taken care of you instead of running from our problems you wouldn't be feeling this way." He holds me tightly to him and I feel the stress melt away.

"We should go away, just the two of us." He pulls away and looks quizzically at me.

"Really?"

"Yes, really." He gives me a lopsided smile.

"I'll make the plans."

"Ok." He leans and kisses me softly.

"Mellie I love you. I want only you please know and believe me when I say that."

"I know Fitz. I just let my insecurities get the best of me."

"It happens to the best of us." He releases me and walks toward the door.

"Where are you going?" He stops and looks back at me.

"To go plan our romantic getaway of course." I smile at him as he leaves. I love that man so much.


	13. Chapter 13-A

**A/N This is a two part chapter so when you get to the end please don't hunt me down to try to string me up. lol **

Fitz's been very mysterious about where we are going. He just tells me to pack for warm weather. I've tried to snoop around to get any information I can, but I've reached a dead end at every pass.

"When you say warm do you mean Arizona warm or Florida warm? Because there's a difference you know." He just shakes his head and laughs.

"I mean warm Mellie."

"You should really tell me where we're going."

"No I shouldn't, but I can pack for you if you're having a difficult time."

"No I can do it." I turn back to the clothes in my closet and pull out the items that I think should be sufficient for the trip. I do know that he's arranged a week long getaway. I figure if I need anything besides what I pack I can buy something... I guess.

The day finally arrives for Mellie and me to leave for our trip. We haven't had much time together because both of us had so many things to tie up before we left the country. I'm thankful that she's been pretty busy and hasn't had the time to pester me about where we're going.

"Babe you about ready?" I walk into our bedroom looking for Mellie.

"Yeah." She says dragging a suitcase out of the closet. I laugh before going over and helping her.

"We're only going to be gone for a week."

"I know, but I had to cover all my bases because you wouldn't tell me where we're going." I just smile at her and take her suitcase downstairs. Mellie and I say goodbye to the kids before heading to the airport. I've chartered a private jet to take us to our destination. "How long is the flight?"

"Fifteen or so hours." I see the wheels turning in her head.

"Non-stop?" I turn to her and smirk.

"No Mellie we have a planned fueling stop in Switzerland and then we'll fly the rest of the way to our destination. Just sit back and relax." She yawns and I pray sleep falls upon her so she can stop asking questions. I'm happy when I look over and see that she's fallen asleep. Hopefully she stays asleep until we got to Switzerland. I settle into my seat and decide to get some rest.

After a brief refueling in Switzerland we re-board the plane toward our final destination. Fitz has still been tight lipped around where we're going. We pass the time playing card games and chess. We both agreed that we would do no work while away. I feel the plane start to descend, I'm like a kid on Christmas I'm so excited. Fitz won't let me look out the window and the pilots have been instructed to make no announcements. Finally we land the agents traveling with us go ahead to meet up with the agents that arrived first to make sure our transportation is secured. Finally Fitz and I step off the plane and I have no clue where I am. I look at him puzzled.

"You'll see." We get in the car and I know that we have to be somewhere in Spain, but where I have no idea. Finally we reach the dock. "We have to take the ferry to our final destination."I don't even ask where because I know he won't tell me. After about half an hour we arrive to another ferry dock and my breath catches. The waters are the bluest I've ever seen, the beach is a white sand that looks like baby power. We leave the ferry and get into a waiting car.

"Where are we?"

"Majorca, beautiful isn't it." I nod my head in wonder. "I wanted to bring you somewhere you've never been." I lean over and kiss him.

"This is amazing." Mellie and I travel for forty five minutes before reaching the villa that I rented for us. She stares at the window the entire time, taking in everything and I am happy that she's happy. The car heads up a long driveway through lush greenery and we come upon a villa with a stone facade. Mellie and I exit the car and head into the home and we both are at a loss for words. I'd seen it in pictures, but in person it is much more breathtaking. The floor is covered in a gorgeous local stone that is cream with flecks of coral. The ceiling has dark mahogany wood beams, the archways are a beautiful carved marble.

Fitz and I head to our room, we walk through a gorgeous stain glass archway. We are speechless when we see the floor to ceiling windows overlooking the Mediterranean Sea. We walk over holding hands and just stare out into the beautiful blue expanse. I turn and finally take in the rest of the bedroom. The same tile flows through the entire house. The bed is a large mahogany four poster bed, with plush white linens.

"This is gorgeous isn't it?" Fitz pulls me to him and kisses me. I drape my arms around his neck and look into his eyes.

"Yes thank you for planning all of this."

"This is just the beginning. I have an amazing week planned for us." We are exhausted from our long flight so we decide to take a nap before going out and exploring.

The Next Day

Mellie and I spent the previous evening walking the cobbled streets of the island and taking in the beautiful historic architecture before settling down at a small seafood restaurant and having a delicious dinner. When we returned to the villa we both took quick showers and headed for bed. I'm waiting on the patio for Mellie to come out. She got caught up on the phone with Tommy.

"He's a mama's boy." I say teasingly to her.

"Yes, but I'm not complaining they grow up so fast. Teddy barely wants me to kiss him these days."

"Do you want to have another?" Mellie starts to cough on the juice she'd just taken a sip of. "Sorry"

"It's ok I'm fine. Fitz I am much too old to be having anymore kids."

"Do you want to practice like we were trying to have another?" I give her a sheepish look, she just smiles at me. After breakfast we head out to the beach. The water is so crystal blue that you can see to the bottom of the sea, the sand is as soft as the finest cotton on our feet.

Mellie is wearing a cover up over her bathing suit and my eyes nearly pop out of my head when she takes it off. It's a one piece that melds to her body perfect, accentuating her curves and her amazing ass.

"Take a picture it will last long." Fitz holds his hand out to me and I let him pull me down onto the sand.

"You are so beautiful." He leans over and captures my mouth in a heated kiss. I am thankful that this is a private beach. I pull back from the kiss.

"You want to take a dip?" He nods his head before removing his shirt. I can't help rubbing my hands over the hard planes of his stomach, which ripple in reflex to my touch. He leans over and lightly bites and licks my neck. I feel the situation quickly escalating so I pull away and stand up. "Let's go." I walk toward the water and suddenly he runs towards me and picks me up. I let out a surprised yelp. "Don't you do it Fitzgerald Thomas Grant III !" Fitz runs into the water and throws me up in the air.

I crack up as Mellie flails about before crashing down into the water. She comes up sputtering and lunges for me. I see the mischievous glint in her eyes. I try to get away, but she's too fast as she uses the waters buoyancy to pop out of the water and push me down into it. I come up sputtering much like she did and we howl in laughter.

We look into each other's eyes and the laughter dies in our throats. I pull her slowly to me and cradle her in my arms. Mellie's leg comes up and around my back as she presses her heat into me. Our lips crash together and her tongue slides into my mouth. My fingers tangle into the wet mess of her hair, we slowly grind against each other and I know we have to stop before things get totally out of control. Remorsefully I pull away from her. I can see in her eyes that she understands.

Fitz and I go back to the villa to get dressed for our night out. We walk to one of the local restaurants. A live Flamenco band plays as we eat dinner.

"Are you having a good time?"

"A fabulous time, you?"

"It's amazing. I'm so glad that you decided to give me another chance, not that I deserved it." I reach across the table and grab his hand.

"We both made mistakes, we both lost ourselves and got caught up in it all. You do deserve this chance if you didn't we wouldn't be here right now. I recognize my part in your infidelities. Did it make it any easier? No it didn't, but a part of the healing was saying what role did I play and being honest with myself when I answered it." I can tell he's shocked by my words.

"You've grown so much, I do hate how much I hurt you."

"Sometimes in life things have to go very wrong before they can then be right. But, sometimes you have to go through your worse, to arrive at your best." He lifts my hand and turns it over, before pressing a soft kiss to the inside of my wrist. A shiver runs through me. Fitz looks up and pins me with a heated gaze.

"Comprueba, por favor!" We both say in unison. Fitz and I walk quickly back to the villa. We are barely in when we fall into each other's arms. I find myself rubbing against him like a cat in heat. He hoists me into his arms and carries me into the bedroom. Fitz gently lays me down on the bed and I sit up reaching for him. He shakes his head no.

"Let me." I lay back on the bed as he sits down on the edge, next to me. He runs his fingertips slowly up my leg. The goose pimples rise and cause me to shiver. Fitz grabs my ankle and removes my shoe slowly, he gently sets my leg down before grabbing the other and repeating the motion. He takes my leg in his hand and raises it to his mouth where he kisses the side of my ankle. "I have never known a more beautiful woman."

I want to take my time, I want to worship her like she deserves to be worshipped. My hand slowly slides up her thigh and grips lightly when I make it to the top. Mellie looks at me through heavy lids as she bites gently down on her bottom lip. I can feel the heat coming from her center. I bend and kiss my way up her leg. When I reach the inside of her thigh I lightly nip, she jumps and then moans. I can smell her sweetness, her underwear is stained with her wetness. I bend and kiss her panty covered crotch lightly sucking at the wet material, Mellie grinds herself against me. I sit up.

"You taste so amazing." I grab the hem of her dress and pull it up over her head. She lays before me in only her blue lace bra and matching panties. My finger skims along her flat stomach until I reach her breast. I gently cup both of them and squeeze. I can feel her hard nipples through the material. I motion for her to sit up so that I can remove her bra. It's barely off when I bend and latch onto the taut nipple. Mellie moans and holds my head to her.

"You're so overdressed Fitz." Her voice is husky and my cock jumps at the sound. I pull my shirt over my head and her fingers run over my pecs, teasing my nipples. She knows my body well.

Fitz grabs my wrist and pins them over my head before climbing over me. The predatory look in his eyes makes me quake in anticipation. He slowly bends and swipes his tongue against my collarbone before nipping at the sensitive skin. I try to maneuver so that I can grind myself against his hardened flesh, but he positions himself just out of my reach.

"Please" I moan frustrated.

"Patience my dear. I'll give you what you need." I nearly melt at the sound of his voice and his words. I know that he will give me what I need and more. He releases my wrists, but gives me a look that tells me not to move. Fitz sits up and removes his pants, his member strains against his boxers. He rubs himself through the silky fabric, I nearly draw blood when I bite my lower lip. I shut my eyes tightly. I feel him climb back on the bed, I know he is near when I feel the heat radiating from his body. "Open your eyes."

Slowly I open my eyes and I gasp at the raw hot lust that stares back at me. Fitz licks his lips and I prepare myself to be devoured. He moves his mouth over mine, my arms move around his neck and I hold him to me. I wrap my leg around his back and grind myself into him. He groans into my mouth. Fitz disengages and I whine in protest. He just smirks. He begins to kiss down my body and I am giddy with anticipation. He licks a line down the middle of my stomach until he gets to my navel where he gently laves it. Fitz nips at the skin right above my waistband and my body jerks. I feel him smiling against me. His fingers skim along my panty line before slowly moving underneath the fabric. He touches me briefly before retreating.

I know she is getting frustrated, but I want to thoroughly please her. I hook my fingers into the waistband of her panties and pull them down. Mellie lifts slightly to allow me to pull them all the way down her legs. I close my eyes and suppress a moan when her beautiful body is fully revealed to me. My fingers run through her neatly trimmed brown curls before I bend and kiss her mound. I hear her breath hitch in her throat and I am pleased I can still elicit this type of response from her.

I sit up and part her thighs, her pink flesh is glistening with want for me and I feel my cock start to leak with pre-cum. I run my finger down her slit, Mellie jerks against me.

"Fitz I need you." She half moans and half whines and I'm fully turned on.

"Patience Melody." My finger dips into her wetness. I shallowly move it in and out of her. She starts to buck against me trying to get me to go deeper. I place my other hand on her stomach to still her motions, never breaking eye contact with her. I watch her pupils dilate as I move in deeper and begin to caress her g-spot. She clinches her jaw when I slowly glide another finger into her. She clinches around me as her eyes flutter closed.

Abruptly he removes his fingers from me and my eyes fly open. He's looking at me intently as he slowly brings his fingers up to his mouth and licks them clean. My eyes go wide. I want, no I need him so badly.

"Do I taste good?" I say innocently. He bites his lower lip before speaking.

"You know that you do." Fitz kisses both of my thighs before swiping his tongue against my heat. A strangled cry rushes out of me and I clamp my legs around him. He opens my legs before diving into me completely. His tongue runs from my clit down to my opening repeatedly and I swear I'm going to die from the pleasure. He sits up and licks my wetness off his face. Fitz stands and removes his boxers.

"You are so fucking hot." He just smiles and climbs back on the bed. He hovers over me slowly stroking himself.

"Touch yourself, I want to watch you." My fingers move slowly down my body, he's watching my every move. I move my finger over my slit, I watch him watching me. He resumes stroking himself and my eyes are drawn down his body to his long hard manhood. "Open yourself and let me see you rubbing your clit." I do as I'm told. I use my left hand to open myself up while my right index finger slowly circles my clit. Suddenly he removes my hands. "Lick your fingers clean."

Mellie doesn't hesitate bringing her wet fingers to her mouth. She licks them thoroughly clean. I dip my head back to her heat, my tongue slides into her wet opening.

"Fitz I want to taste you." She says breathlessly. I sit up and lay on my back Mellie climbs over me and straddles with her back to me. I pull her hips toward my mouth as she bends and swipes her tongue against my tip. I move my mouth back to her sweetness.

I'm fighting to keep my concentration as Fitz brings me ever closer to my release with his mouth. I find myself grinding against him, as he holds tightly to my thighs. I drag my fingernails across his sack. The vibrations from his groin causes a shock of pleasure to tear through me.

My tongue swipes his tip I am sure to catch every drop of his pre-cum before taking him fully into my mouth. I rub along his shaft with my tongue and I feel his movements against me falter ever so slightly. I'm pleased with myself. I form a tight seal around him as I begin to move up and down his length. I feel his fingertips dig into my thighs. The room is filled with the sounds of our moans and wet flesh. He suddenly makes a move for me to stop. I sit up and look back at him. I'm about to move off of him, but he moves his arm around my lower abdomen and sits up. He holds me against his body as he bites the back of my shoulder.

"What's wrong?" I ask looking over my shoulder slightly.

"I want to be joined with you the first time we cum." He breathes into my ear. My head falls back onto his shoulder.

"You are torturing me you know." He just chuckles before sobering. He moves me onto my back and hovers over me.

"I love you so much." Mellie reaches up and pulls me down to her. We share a heated kiss before we part to allow air into our lungs.

"I love you Fitzgerald more than I could ever express to you." I move over her and rub my tip along her wetness. Mellie opens her legs and I settle between them. Our fingers intertwine above her head as I push myself into her.


	14. Chapter 13-B

A/N: So I'm going to just take me a break after the marathon writing sessions I had to do to get this done. I'm about as exhausted as Mellie and Fitz in this fic.

Fitz sheaths himself inside of me and starts to build a slow rhythm. He bends and we share a slow intense kiss. Our eyes stay locked on each other. He releases me and I wrap my arms around him, slowly rubbing his back and encouraging him to take me. His thrusts pick up slightly, my legs tighten around his back. Fitz bends and kisses just below my ear and peppers my jaw line with light pecks. He cups my breast and gently thumbs my nipple.

"You feel so good Mels. You pussy is so amazing." Fitz states against my neck. My fingers move up to his hair and run them through his curls.

"I love your hair like this." I feel him smile before he raises up and looks at me seriously.

"You still find me attractive?" Mellie looks at me shocked.

"Yes of course you're gorgeous." She moves her hand to cup my face and lifts up to capture my mouth. Her tongue slides into my mouth and tangles with mine. She clinches around me as I move slowly in and out of her wet heat. "Why wouldn't you think I would?" This is a weird place to have this conversation, but I'm curious.

"Alexander was so much younger than I am."

"I'm not with Alexander right now am I? I don't love him, I never did. I love you I want you." She says the last part breathlessly as my tip glides along her g-spot. I am comforted by her words and the look she gives me. I flip us over until I'm on my back. Mellie sits up and begins to move along my shaft. I sit up and hold her to me as our bodies move together. I take note of every moan, every shudder, every time her eyes change colors and become a deeper blue.

"So exquisite." I say running my fingers through her thick luscious locks. She bites my jaw and clinches against me as our nipples rub. She puts her head in the crook of neck. My hands move down her back to her tight ass and I squeeze.

"You've always loved my ass."

"Sure as hell have. It's perfection." She lets out a yelp of pleasure when I push up into her.

Fitz pulls me off his shaft and turns me around before guiding me back down onto him. I lay my back against his chest. "Yes baby ride that dick." Fitz grabs me around my waist and moves me up and down his shaft. I move my hips in a circular motion and he groans. "Fuck." He breathes.

"Fitz you feel so good. Oh I've needed this so badly for so long."

"I love watching my cock move in and out of your pussy. This is mine, you are mine." He kisses my neck.

"Yes I am Fitz. Yes I'm yours. I'm so close baby. Please let me cum." I move Mellie off of me and flip her on to her back. I spread her legs before laying back on top of her, sliding my length back into her slickness. Her fingers dig into my back. Mellie begins to meet me thrust for thrust. I lay myself on top of her fully.

"I can't get close enough to you. If I could step inside of you it wouldn't be close enough." Her arms tighten around me and she clings to me like her life depends on it. Her legs wrap around my back as my thrust begin to pick up.

"Fitz cum for me baby." Mellie lovingly runs her fingers through my hair. "Use my body for your pleasure." My movement momentarily falters.

"You are literally perfection." I say before crushing my lips against her. I pull myself away from her and begin to pull out almost entirely and slam myself back into her. Mellie clinches her muscles around my heat and moves her hips against me driving me crazy.

"Fitz you feel so good. I can feel every vein, every ridge. God so good I have never had any other man make me feel like you do. You fill me up entirely."

"You fit around me so perfect Mellie. I just don't know how you've had four kids and your pussy is just so fucking tight." Melle's legs tighten and she bites her lips as her thrusts against me start to pick up. "You close baby?" She just nods.

"Shit Fitz! I love you. I love you." Mellie begins to come undone, tears stream down her face as her orgasm overtakes her. She closes her eyes and the sexiest look falls upon her face. Her clinching takes me over the edge.

"Mel! I've missed my Mels so much. God I love you!" I start to come down from my high. I open my eyes just as Fitz begins to find his release. I rub his back when I see the tears streaming down his face. He lays down on top of me and kisses the side of my face when his orgasm starts to subside. We hold each other and ride out the last few vestiges of our mutual orgasms. We are a snotty, crying mess and neither of us would change a thing.

He removes himself from me and I whine. He gives me one of his lopsided grins and I feel like my heart is going to burst with all the love I feel for him. He gathers me into his arms and holds me tightly.

"I love you." Fitz murmurs against my hair. "I am so sorry for everything I've done to hurt you." His voice breaks and I look up at him and see the unshed tears. I kiss his face.

"It's ok sweetie. I know you are sorry. We will live in the present and look forward to the future no more looking back." He nods his head. He tries to suppress a yawn. "Did I wear you out?" I say before kissing his Adam's apple." Before he can respond I yawn. We look at each other and laugh. We laugh a lot these days it's very refreshing.

"We wore each other out." I nod in agreement before settling back down on his chest. Our legs are intertwined and we let the sound of the sea outside lull us into a much needed rest.

My eyes flutter open when a shock of pleasure runs through my body. I look over my shoulder into Fitz's eyes, he's bathed in the moon light filtering through the window. He kisses my shoulder before speaking.

"I just couldn't resist touching you." I nod and lay my head back on the pillow. Fitz runs his hand down my stomach until he comes to the juncture between my thighs. I part my legs slightly and he touches me seeing that I am wet and ready. He lifts my leg before placing his leg between mine. Fitz tips my pelvis back slightly and I feel him hard and hot against my thigh. He wraps his arms around me before pushing into my body. He hisses in my ear once he is fully inside of me. We lay still momentarily and just relish in the feeling of being joined. Fitz pushes himself against me, we intertwine our fingers, as he holds me around my waist. He kisses the back of my neck.

Mellie sighs and pushes herself back against me. I start to move faster against her as the heat builds. The sound of my turgid manhood moving within her slick passage fills the room and spurs my thrusting on. Her fingers grip mine tighter and tighter. Mellie lets out a strangled cry as her head falls forward. Our bodies start to slam together, our legs tangled in the covers, the sheets are damp with our sweat and combined essence. I pull her against me tightly as I push into her and rotate my hips that's all it takes and she cums screaming. I feel the wetness pool around my cock and spill between us. I can't hold on much longer as I bite down on her shoulder and grunt out my release. Mellie's thighs are slick with our mutual releases. I keep her against me as I languidly push against her.

"I'm so tired." I know he's smiling with pride. "Fitz I can feel you smiling behind me." He chuckles.

"Well it's nice to know I still have it."

"Yes you very much still have it." At my words I feel him start to harden in me again and my eyes widen. "Did you take a Viagra and didn't tell me?" I look over my shoulder at him. I'm only half joking. He bends and kisses me deeply his penis is now fully hard inside of me.

"You're my Viagra." He pulls from me to allow me to turn over. When I am facing him he pulls me on top of him. Fitz guides me down onto his hardness. I'm a bit sore, it's been years since I've been worked out like this, but it's an exquisite soreness. I move in a circular motion as he fills me completely. He is large, bigger than any man I've ever been with. He penis leaves no part of my womanhood untouched. I use his shoulders to brace myself as I set a frantic pace. He reaches up and plays with my breasts. Our eyes lock and we look at each other as we move together. "Breathtaking." He says softly as he moves his hand up to run a finger down my cheek. I move my mouth to the side to kiss his hand. I've always loved his large masculine hands.

I slowly move my hands down her body recommitting to memory every part of her body. Relearning all of her most intimate secrets. We can't tear our eyes off of each other. I've always loved how expressive her face is when we make love. I grab her around the waist as she moves up and down my cock. Mellie bends and bites my bottom lip. She kisses down my face and nips at my chin. My hands grip her ass. She starts to clinch against me. I move my hands around and part her lips, pushing my thumb against her clit. She bucks against me hard and moans deeply. Her hands go to her breast and she begins to pull and rub her nipples.

"Fuck oh I'm almost there. Shit damn Fitz." I smirk I love when I can get my Southern Belle to curse like a sailor. "Your cock is so good so good!" Mellie shrieks as she reaches her peak. She slams down on me and grips my penis like a vice. My orgasm storms through me and I arch off the bed as I feel my semen shoot out of my body and into Mellie. I collapse back against the bed as my orgasm finally releases me from its grip. Mellie collapses down on me, her hair splayed wildly against my chest. I know that we're both sated beyond comprehension.

"I'm exhausted as fuck." I feel her smile against my chest. She nods in agreement. My softened penis slips from her and I feel the warm liquids drip out of her. Both our bodies is coated in a sheen of sweat and the breeze coming in from the open windows is delightful.

"I'm too tired to move."

"You don't have to, you can stay right there." I wrap my arms around her and kiss the top of her head. Mellie remains on top of me as we both succumb to a pleasure induced coma.


	15. Chapter 14

A/N: I'm back...did you miss me?

"Mmmmmmm" Fitz tangles his fingers in my hair and holds me to him. I take him fully in my mouth and slowly rise up. I look at him and he is staring at me with lust filled eyes. I never take my eyes off him as I pleasure him with my mouth. I fondle his sack and he takes in a sharp breath. "Suck me baby. Your mouth feels so good." My fingers dance along his sack before I gently press a knuckle into his perineum and stroke him. "Fuck." He states as his body jerks. I continue taking him into my mouth and slowly letting him slip almost all the way out. His hold on my hair tightens. "I'm there baby!" He grunts as his saltiness coats my tongue. I eagerly swallow before licking him clean.

Mellie slowly crawls up my body and lays on my chest. The sun is now shining through the open windows. I'm sure the Secret Service heard us last night, but I'm not in the least bit embarrassed.

"We need to get out of bed." She mummers against my chest. I move my fingers up and down the soft creamy expanse of her back.

"I think we need to take care of something else before we do that." She lifts up and looks at me shaking her head.

"I barely can walk as it is. I need some recovery time." My eyebrow raises.

"You sure." She smiles and kisses me.

"Very." Fitz has always been a generous lover, maybe too generous at time. "What do you have planned for us today? Hopefully not a lot of walking."

"Just some sightseeing, but if you aren't up to it we can scrap it."

"No I'd love to go sightseeing." I smile at her happy that we'll be able to go to some of the destinations I'd planned. We get dressed and call the kids before we head out. Mellie has a pep in her step and I can't help but to be proud that I had something to do with it. We arrive to a field and Mellie's eyes go wide when she sees the many colorful balloons. She looks at me beaming. "Hot air balloon ride?"

"Absolutely." Mellie shrieks in excitement. Mellie and I step into the balloon and we take off. She wraps her arms around me and lays her head on my chest as we look out over the island in wonderment. After the balloon ride Mellie and I grab a quick lunch before heading off to visit Castell de Bellver**. **

"Fitz this trip has been absolutely amazing. I am so thankful to be sharing this experience with you."

"I am thankful that you are allowing me to share this experience with you."

Mellie and my time in Majorca comes to an end and although we loved our trip we are also excited to get back to the kids and our lives.

**Two Weeks Later **

I sneak up on her in the kitchen and grab her from behind, she jumps started by my sudden appearance.

"When did you come in?" Mellie states turning in my arms and kissing me.

"About five minutes ago. Dinner smells wonderful. I have to go over to my place to finish packing after dinner."

Fitz is about to go out of town again, this time to settle some details for his library in California. I was involved in a lot of the planning, but he needs to sign off on what's to be included.

"Oh you should have brought it with you."

"Not sure what I'm taking." I shake my head he has always waited to the very last moment to pack. We have dinner with the kids. We give them a bath and then read them bedtime stories and tuck them in for the night.

"Dinner was amazing." He says kissing me lightly.

"How long will you be gone?"

"Three days." I nod, we haven't spent much time apart since we came back from Majorca and tonight will be the first night I'll sleep alone. We either stay at his place or here. I hug him to me.

"I'm going to miss you." He rubs my back.

"I will miss you too, but I'll be back before you know it." We kiss briefly and then part. Fitz tells me he'll call me as soon as he lands. I feel empty. I turn around and look at the stairs, dreading having to spend a night without him. I've gotten so used to him being around.

I keep getting funny looks because I'm rushing everyone. I want to get back to Mellie as soon as I can. I need to have her in my arms. I know we agreed to live in the present but I can't help but to reflect on our past and how I'd been so stupid. How she almost slipped right through my fingers. I have to focus on the task at hand so I can actually get back to her.

Two Days Later

I'm ecstatic that Fitz is coming home today. I wanted to pick him up, but the boys had doctor's appointments to get shots and I knew they'd be cranky afterwards. I drive them home both after the spectacle at the doctor's office. I hum along to a song on the radio. I enjoy having my life back, being able to drive my kids to the doctor's office is a great joy of mine. Of course I have agents in front of me and trailing me, but at least right now I can pretend that my life is that of a normal soccer mom. When I arrive home my agents help me carry the now sleeping boys into the house. I put them down for naps and I know from past experiences they'll be out for awhile.

I decide to start dinner and keep looking at my watching anxious for Fitz to come home. I'm making his favorite seafood linguine. It's one of the first things I ever cooked for him. I turn on some music and begin to dance around the kitchen a bit, letting the music and joy that I have in my life take me away.

I come into the house and hear faint music coming from the kitchen. I walk quietly to the kitchen when I hear Mellie singing along with the music. A huge smile spreads across my face. The closer I get to the kitchen I also smell the delicious aroma and I know she's making my favorite. Mellie has her back to me as she dances around the kitchen and sings. I stand in the doorway and just watch her.

_"And it's only one person I can think of that makes me feel like this. And I'm a fool, such a fool for you."_ She is perfectly on key and I am transported back to when Gerry was a baby and she'd sing him lullabies. I haven't heard her sing in so long. Mellie turns and sees me. She moves to turn the music off I walk over to her and she stops and faces me.

_"Ooh baby, let me do it, let me do it 'til I'm satisfied__. __Oh baby, now please, baby, I ain't got no more pride. Oh, sweet sugar, I surrender. I don't want no other woman, oh baby, you win." _I can't help, but to break out in a huge smile when he walks toward me singing. His deep baritone soothes me. When he comes within inches of me I throw myself into his arms and hug him tightly. We kiss passionately, when we break apart he grabs my face and just stares into my eyes.

"I missed you like crazy." Before I can speak he plants another soul shattering kiss on me. I cling to him like he's my lifeline.

"I don't like when you leave me." I state with my face buried in his neck.

"I don't like leaving you." Mellie reluctantly pulls away from me to go check on the food. I walk over and wrap my arms around her waist. "Can I have a taste?" I state bending down to her ear, my lips brushing against it. She spoons out a bit of the sauce and brings the spoon over her shoulder. I take a taste. "Mmmm so yummy, just about as yummy as you." She giggles.

"Fitz you are so bad." I kiss the side of her face before letting her waist go.

"Where are the boys?"

"Sleeping, they had shots today." I nod understanding.

"Well I'm going to go jump in the shower and unpack a bit." We kiss once more before I walk out of the kitchen.

I head upstairs to what I refer to as our room even though I don't officially live here, not yet at least. I unpack my clothes and throw them in the hamper, before jumping in the shower. When I'm done I come back into the bedroom and look around to make sure Mellie hasn't come up before I pull the small box out of my carryon. I open it and look at the ring for the hundredth time.

I close it and hide it in my sock drawer. I'm not ready to ask her. Well I am ready to ask her, but I don't think she'd say yes, I have to wait until the time is right. I just couldn't pass the ring up when I saw it, it was perfect for her. I stand wondering if I should leave it in the drawer, I don't want her to find it before I think she's ready. I know Mellie and I know how she can be if she feels pressured. We have a freeness about us that honestly we've never had, not even early on. I don't want anything threatening that. I decide to leave it where it is for now.

I hear the boys running down the stairs after awhile and leave the room to go see my two little guys. They shriek with joy when they see me and I am happy that I have a good relationship with them. I just wish things could have been better with Gerry before... Tommy jumps on me and I cut off the sad thought process.

Fitz and I have dinner with the boys. I end up making them grilled cheese because they were having none of the linguine, I should have known that was going to be the case. They missed their dad so they make it more than clear that they want him to give them baths and tuck them in for the night. I decide to clean up the kitchen while Fitz gets them down for the night. He comes into the kitchen just as I'm turning the dishwasher on. He looks around.

"I guess there's nothing for me to do here." I walk over to him shaking my head as I grab his hand and lead him into the den. We sit on the sofa and kiss lightly.

"I wanted to talk to you about something."

"Sure." I'm not sure why I'm suddenly nervous this is very silly considering who I'm talking to.

"Well I was thinking that..." Her nervousness is making me anxious. "You stay here a lot because my place is bigger and more kid friendly. I was just thinking that maybe you'd want to move in?" He smirk at me.

"You're asking me to move in with you?"

"Yes I'm asking you to move in with you." I grab my chest and feign shock.

"My oh my Melody Grant what would you mother say about this?" She giggles and drops her head. "You want to shack up with me?"

"You know my mother is old fashioned Southern Baptist so as far as she's concerned we are still married."

"Of course I will move in with you. It would be my honor." I lean over and kiss her. The kiss deepens and we decide to retire to the bedroom before things go further. I spend the rest of the night showing her just how honored I am. __


	16. Chapter 15

A/N This chapter had to be written, certain things had to be said.

I'm putting away a few of my clothes when I hear the downstairs door open and close. I look at my watch, Mellie's back early.

"Babe I'm up here!" I yell to her. I go back to putting my clothes in the drawer. I moved in a week ago, but we've both been so busy that I've barely had time to unpack. I've been living out of boxes and it's gotten more than a little annoying.

"I'm sure you weren't calling for me." I look up into Karen's face. I'm surprised to see her, she wasn't supposed to be here till later today.

"Hey honey." I go to hug her, but she steps back. I'm confused. "What's wrong?"

"What are you doing?"

"Hugging you?" I asked perplexed by her question and behavior.

"No what are you doing here?" I look around still confused.

"I live here." She shakes her head and walks away. "What's wrong Karen? Didn't your mom tell you that I moved in?" Karen and I still have a terse relationship. We get along, but I can always tell that she hasn't completely forgiven me for what I've done. She mostly talks to Mellie when she makes her weekly calls. I think back briefly to when I'd been delusional to think I was the better parent.

"Yeah she did and I didn't want to hurt her she just seemed so happy, but I know it won't last. I came here to tell you to do the right thing and let her go before you hurt her again. It's only a matter of time we both know it." I take a deep breath before speaking.

"Karen I own up to all the horrible things that happened between me and your mother before, but I love her. I've never stopped loving her and I will spend the rest of my life showing her that." She scoffs and shakes her head.

"Until what dad? The next Olivia Pope comes around or how about Olivia Pope herself? I saw that newspaper with you two looking ever so cozy." I drop my head and try to compose myself.

"I explained that photo to your mother and she understood. I'm not interested in Olivia or any other woman except your mom. I can totally understand why you think that I'll hurt her, but I won't. You your brothers and your mother are my life. I understand that now. I was stupid before, but losing her opened my eyes, losing your brother opened my eyes."

"I don't believe you and I really don't know how she could either. You are a lying cheating bastard."

"Why are you so angry with me? We've been getting along."

"That was before you started your quest to break her heart again. I won't stand by and let you do this. You just couldn't let her be happy with that Alexander guy you had to interfere knowing she still had feelings for you. What is this some type of macho move? Once you prove that she'll never love anyone, but you, you'll leave her again."

"Karen I hate what I've done to you. I was supposed to be your role model for how a man treats a woman and I failed you. I failed Gerry and your mother, but I promise you that I'm different now. I've seen the error of my ways and I am so sorry for what I've done. I will not hurt you or your mother or your brothers anymore."

"Words, that's all you've ever been about is words." I realize that I can only show her that I am being sincere.

"My actions will speak louder than my words."

"Fitz is Karen up there?" I hear Mellie calling from downstairs.

"Yes we're upstairs!" Karen and I stand staring at each other. Mellie appears in the doorway.

"You're early honey!" She goes to Karen and hugs her.

"I decided to take an earlier flight." I felt the tension in the room the moment I stepped in. I look between Fitz and Karen, but neither of their faces betray what's going on.

"Well you should have told me. Your father and I could have picked you up."

"I wanted some time to talk to dad...alone." She glances at Fitz and I look at him with my brow furrowed. He looks away, I will be asking him about this later.

"Ok well the boys aren't here. We were going to pick them up on our way to get you later this evening."

"No problem. I'll just go unpack and get settled." She hugs me again before walking out of the room. Fitz turns to go into the closet.

"What was that about?" He shakes his head trying to convey an air of nonchalance but I'm not buying it. "Fitzgerald." He sighs and turns to me. I can see hurt in his stormy blue eyes.

"I've really fucked up Mels."

"What happened?" My heart skips a beat and anxiety creeps up my neck. I'm nervous about what he's about to tell me. I guess in the back of my mind there is still some doubt.

"Karen doesn't want us back together. She thinks I'm going to hurt you. And really how can I blame her?" He takes a deep breath and tries to distract himself by folding some of his clothes.

"Fitz we both made mistakes."

"You weren't the one that paraded your mistress around, told your wife that you were in love with another woman just to hurt her, tried to replace your kids... I fucked up and I wouldn't be surprised if she never trusted me again." I walk to him and wrap my arms around his waist.

"We agreed to not live in the past. From this moment forward you will prove to her that you're a changed man. There is no point in continually apologizing for what was, just make what is, better for everyone." I kiss the side of his face and smooth his hair.

Mellie and I pick the boys up from Cyrus' house. I laugh just thinking about the fact that my sons have play dates at his house, play dates that he initiates. He's re-married and his new husband has a son Tommy's age. He likes for the boys to come over and play with Ella and Nathan.

The ride to the restaurant is mostly silent. The boys talk to each other and occasionally asks Mellie a question. Karen keeps her head buried in her phone.

"How's your classes going Karen?" Mellie looks behind her into the back seat.

"Fine I guess." Karen shrugs and goes back to her phone.

"I know freshmen year of college can be a huge adjustment. If you need anything please don't hesitate to ask your father and I."

"Mom please." Mellie sighs and turns back around. I can tell that she's hurt for a lot of reasons, but mainly that Karen isn't happy. We arrive at the restaurant and Karen picks at her food.

"I thought you liked this place."

"I'm not really hungry." The rest of the dinner is ate in silence. We leave the restaurant and Teddy and Tommy are out before we can leave the parking lot.

"Can you go put them down for me?" I ask Fitz when we arrive home and he nods before kissing me. Karen goes to her room and closes the door. I knock lightly. I hear her say come in. When I enter she's sitting on her bed with her arms crossed. "Want to talk?"

"Not really." I pull the chair from her desk and sit down staring at her.

"Are you angry with me?"

"No not angry disappointed." The pain slices through me.

"Why?" She looks at me and drops her head.

"I don't mean to hurt you mom, I'm not him."

"Your father has changed." She shakes her head.

"How can you be so trusting after all he's done to you, to us?"

"I'm not that trusting, but I know your father and I know he's changed. I know he's being sincere. I love him and he loves me."

"How long before that love isn't enough for him? You've always loved him and he claimed he always love you so what happened?"

"We happened. We got in our own ways and at the time didn't trust in each other enough to talk it through. I didn't trust your father enough to talk things through." I can see the question in her gaze. "Something happened to me a long time ago that changed the very fabric of my being. Instead of telling your father I hid it from him for years. I don't want to go into specifics, but there was a lot of misunderstandings because of it."

"So you're saying him cheating on you was your fault?"

"No I don't absolve your father of his infidelities, but I understand the road that my decisions lead us to and I don't totally blame him. Neither of us is blameless for the decisions we made."

"I want to believe him mom I do. You are so happy, happier than I've ever remembered, but I just keep thinking about how broken you were, I don't want Teddy and Tommy to have to see you that way." My heart breaks for all the pain that my little girl's been through. I stand from the chair and climb onto the bed pulling Karen into my embrace.

"I'm so sorry for the pain you had to go through baby girl." I say softly before kissing the top of her head. She holds onto me tightly.

"It's not your fault."

"It is my fault and it's your dads fault and we are going to make sure we do everything in our power to make everything going forward better for you and your brothers." She nods against me and continues to hold onto me tightly. Karen yawns. "I'm going to let you get some rest ok?" She disengages for me and I kiss her forehead.

"I love you mom."

"I love you too sweetie." We hug again before I get up and leave her room. I walk to mine and Fitz's room and he's sitting in bed reading. I close the door behind me.

"How did that go?" I stop my progress towards the closet and turn towards him.

"Are you really in this?" He looks at me confused.

"Yes of course."

"We cannot hurt our children anymore. If you have any doubt you need to tell me now so that we can stop this." I'm shocked at what she's asking me. I stand from the bed and walk to her. She stays rooted in place. I take her face between my hands.

"I am one hundred percent sure that you are the woman I love, that you are the woman I want to spend the rest of my life with. There is no doubt whatsoever, do you have doubts?"

"I don't doubt how much I love you and how committed I am too you, but I just want to make sure that you feel the same." I feel like such an ass. I've done so much to Mellie, thrown her love in her face countless times, that even when I've done nothing but shown her love she still doubts me.

"I do feel the same. I've never stopped feeling this way. I just decided to pull my head out of my ass and stop moping around and feeling sorry for myself. I decided to be a man and face whatever issues we had or have, head on. I decided to stop blaming you for everything and take some responsibility for my part in the debacle that was our marriage. Mels I've done a lot of soul searching even after we divorced and everything always came back to you and how very much I love you and only you."

Tears begin to stream down her face and I bend, kissing them away. She wraps her arms around my waist and holds me to her body tightly. We move to the bed and I lay her down gently. Mellie and I show each other love until the early morning hours, when we finally fall into an exhausted slumber. __


	17. Chapter 16

A/N How amazing have the first two epis been for the second half of the season? I've loved every minute.

I'm trying not to freak out, but I'm freaking out. I look at the calendar again and count the days. It's been over forty days since my last period.

"Fuck" Fitz and I have been fucking like rabbits without a care in the world for birth control. My first thought is to go get a pregnancy test, but I decide against it. As it happens I have an appointment with my gyn in three days. I'll wait till then. I hear Fitz and the boys come in from outside and I put on my happy face. I don't want to say anything to him right now, not until I'm sure.

Three Days Later

I have nearly driven myself crazy with worry. I cannot be pregnant it just isn't a good time. Actually at my age it will never be a good time again. I am ushered into the private waiting room of the office and I can't stop pacing. Finally the call my name. I'm told to get undressed and to put one of those horrible paper gowns on. My doctor finally comes into the room to put me out of my misery.

"How are you Melody?" Dr. Sarzen sits on a stool with my chart in hand.

"I think I'm pregnant." I blurt out and she looks at me shocked. She looks at me exactly how I'm feeling.

"What makes you think that?"

"I'm over a month late."

"Hmmm" She says before looking back down in my chart. What is in my chart? Are the answers to all my fears in my chart! "I wasn't aware that you were sexually active." Oh have I been sexually active.

"Yes." I say simply.

"I'll be right back." She stands and leaves the room. She comes back quickly. "I have them running a pregnancy test. While we wait I'll do your exam." Dr. Sarzen completes my exam as her nurse comes in with a small slip of paper. "Well my dear you are not pregnant." I release the breath I didn't realize I was holding.

"Why am I late?"

"Well I would say that you are premenopausal. " I'd almost rather hear I was pregnant.

"How can we be sure?"

"I want you to have some labs drawn. I'll check your hormone levels and of course your pap smear will rule out cervical cancer. I didn't feel anything in your uterus I'm pretty positive you are premenopausal. You'll start seeing erratic periods, lighter flows or heavier flows, cramping may be different."

"Is there anything I should be doing?"

"Using protection." I'm confused by her statement. "Since your period is going to be irregular you won't be able to really count your ovulation days. This is the time where a lot of women end up pregnant with late in life babies. I really don't want to put you on birth control." She stands and grabs a few pamphlets. "Talk to your partner about these options. I'll call you with the results of your blood work." She leaves me to get dressed and I have my blood drawn before I leave.

I am relieved I'm not pregnant I really am, but menopausal that sucks. When I get back home I look over the pamphlets she's given me. One is for a tubal ligation the other for a vasectomy. I read through each one and decide to get online to do a little research of my own. I know I'll have to speak with Fitz about this.

Later That Night

Fitz and I are in bed. He's reading a book and I decide to broach the subject about my doctor's visit.

"Fitz I need to talk to you." He puts the book down and looks over at me.

"Everything ok?"

"Yeah I saw my gyn today." I notice him shift in the bed. As much as he likes to poke and prod at my vagina the idea of me going to have said vagina checked out has always made him uncomfortable.

"You ok?"

"Yes apparently I'm premenopausal."

"How do you know that?"

"I'm late." His eyes go wide.

"I'm not pregnant calm down, but that's what I wanted to talk to you about. The doctor said that because my periods are going to be erratic that we should think about birth control. Due to my age she doesn't want me on the pill." He nods his head, but I'm not sure he's following. "You need to get a vasectomy."

"What?"

"Yeah I did some research and it would be best if you got fixed." I hand him the pamphlet and he pulls his hand away like it's leprosy. "Really Fitzgerald?"

"I don't want to get a vasectomy." She just stares at me. I don't want to admit to her that I'm afraid of having someone cutting on my nether regions.

"It's an outpatient procedure. They can do it in the doctor's office."

"Why can't you get fixed?" She rolls her eyes.

"Because for me it's much more involved, it's actually surgery. They'd have to put me under and go inside. You get a numbing shot in your balls."

"No no no stop talking."

Fitz! You're acting like a fucking baby. I have pushed out four children, naturally and you don't want to have the little procedure so I don't have to push out a fifth?" I know she's highly annoyed on the verge of being angry with me. I take a deep breath.

"Fine."

"I'm glad you see it my way otherwise you were going to be going without." Mellie smiles at me before turning over to go to bed.

Two Weeks Later

Dr. Sarzen called and confirmed that I was in fact premenopausal so Fitz schedule the procedure and actually went through with it.

I want to laugh so badly at him, but I won't. He is acting like he literally had his nuts cut off. I come into the living room where he's sprawled out on the sofa with an ice pack to his crotch. I hand him a glass of water and his pills.

"I can't believe you talked me into doing this."

"Were you planning on having more kids?"

"Obviously not, but I certainly didn't want my balls cut open."

"Dramatic much?"

"Just do me a favor and keep the boys away from me. You know how they like to crawl all over me." She smirks and shakes her head before leaving the room. I know she thinks I'm being a baby and I probably am, but I am in pain.

I have to help Fitz up the stairs to our bedroom. I've been giving him a rough time today because frankly he's being a big baby, but I do appreciate him doing this. When I have him settled in bed for the night I climb in next to him.

"Thank you."

"For what?"

"For doing this." He smiles at me and pecks my lips.

"It's nothing. I'd do anything to make sure you don't have to go through unnecessary pain and I knew both the procedure and you getting pregnant would be dangerous for you."

"I know you are in pain."

"Not as much pain as I'd be if anything happened to you because I was being a selfish coward." I lay my head on his chest.

"When you are feeling better I'll make it up to you."

"I'm going to hold you to that."


	18. Chapter 17

A/N So I don't know if you all have notice but I'm winding this one down. One more chapter for a nice even 18 and it will be done. Thanks for all the amazing reviews.

I drive to the airport to pick Karen up. I am hopeful that she's in a much better mood than she was the last time she visited. I park in the pickup line and I soon see Karen walking out of the airport pulling her suitcase behind her. When she gets close to the car I jump out and help her put her bag into the car. Karen and I get into the car and I head towards the highway.

"How have you been?" She just shrugs. "Karen I know that you have apprehensions about your dad and I, but trust me honey he's changed and this is the real thing." She huffs out a breath and turns to look out the window. I know something is bothering her. "Karen what's wrong? Talk to me." She turns to me and her glassy eyed expression worries me.

"Mom I want you to be happy, but it's not with him he's a liar."

"Karen trust me."

"No mom listen to me. You don't know what he did." I glance over at her and then turn back to the road.

"Tell me."

"He bought her a house, in Vermont. He was...is planning to move there with her and have a whole new family. He's going to forget all about us. He's just biding his time."

"I know about Vermont sweetie. I've known about Vermont the entire time. And trust me your father is not planning to have a family with anyone else."

"Mom why are you so trusting of him?"

"Honey not that this is any of your business, but your dad recently had a vasectomy." Karen immediately covers her ears.

"Gross mom, just gross!"

"Well you brought it all up."

"I didn't want to know that. I wish there was such a thing as brain bleach." Karen is silent for a moment. "So he agreed to do that thing that is just ugh so gross?" I can't help, but to laugh.

"Yes Karen I asked and he did it." Karen's eyebrows quirked up.

"Maybe I've been wrong about him."

"Him? You mean your dad?" She sighs and turns back to the window.

"Yeah my dad." Karen and I have lunch and then I drop her off at the house before I go to a meeting.

I'm sitting outside by the pool reading when Karen comes outside.

"Where are the boys?"

"Still at school."

"I can't believe they both are in school. Time seems to have flown by."

"Yeah it seems just like yesterday Tommy was born, now he's six and Teddy is eight." She nods and sits next to me. We sit in silence before she turns to me.

"I'm sorry."

"For?"

"Being a jerk to you." I chuckle lightly.

"You had every right to be angry with me Karen. I'm glad that you are so protective of your mom. She deserves it, she's an amazing woman."

"You really love her? You aren't going to hurt her?"

"I really love her Karen, I never stopped and I can't promise that I won't mess up from time to time because I am only human, but I will not hurt her, not like I did before. I only have eyes for Mellie."

"I believe you." She says softly.

"I'm glad." Karen stands and sits on my lap, wrapping her arms tightly around my neck.

"I love you daddy."

"I love you too baby girl."

Mellie walks out of the bathroom drying her hair as I watch her from the bed.

"I had a great talk with Karen this afternoon."

"Oh really?" She says smiling at me.

"Yes really."

"I thought she might come around."

"Oh?"

"Yeah she was worried about Vermont." I can't keep the shock off my face.

"How did she know about that?"

"I don't know I didn't ask, but I assured her that you would not be running off to Vermont and starting a new family."

"You didn't tell her did you?"

"Yes I did."

"Honey."

"Well she needed the reassurance."

" I guess." He holds his arms out to me and I lay the towel on the chair before climbing into bed. "Since Karen is here we should see if she'd like to spend some quality time with her brother's while we go away for the weekend."

"What did you have planned?"

"Santa Barbra."

"That's hardly a weekend trip." He leans over and kisses me softly.

"It can be." Fitz looks deep into my eyes and I know I can't deny him anything.

"We can check with her tomorrow." He gives me that devastatingly handsome smile, before moving me onto my back.

Santa Barbra

We arrive out our home in Santa Barbra and all we can think about is going to bed. Our plane was delayed due to a storm and it's well past one in the morning when we arrive. Mellie and I drag our tired bodies up to our room and crash. Thankfully all my plans are for later in the day.

My eyes flutter open and I smile as the bright California sun peaks through the curtains. I love it here, always have. Fitz's arm is thrown over my midsection, I can feel his warm breath ghosting against the back of my neck.

"Don't you just want to stay here forever?" I feel him smile.

"How did you know I was awake?"

"I just know." He chuckles lightly.

"Here in Santa Barbra or here in bed?"

"Both." I say softly.

"Well we can always move back to Santa Barbra my dear there is no reason for us to stay in D.C., but as far as bed goes I have things planned so we must leave the bed." I roll over and give him a small kiss.

"What do you have planned?" He shakes his head.

"You'll see." Fitz hops out of bed and I follow him with my eyes.

"Well the last time you planned a surprise we went to Majorca and it was amazing, so I will let you have this one." We dress and leave the house. Fitz decides to drive us into town. I am still none the wiser of what he has planned for the day.

We drive for a short time before we pull up to a familiar building. A smile spreads across my face. I turn to him.

"We haven't been here in forever."

"Yes I know, which is why we are here now." Finch and Fork, one of mine and Mellie's favorite places to have breakfast when we lived in Santa Barbra. We walk into the restaurant hand in hand and it's a familiar comfortable sight. Not much has changed since we were last here over a decade ago. Mellie and I are seated and we don't even look at the menu, we know what we want, Short Rib and Sweet Potato Hash we say in unison. She's holding my hand and staring at me with a wistful smile on her face.

"I'm really excited about this food."

"I can see that." All conversation is halted when the food arrives and we dig in. We for lack of a better term, destroy our food and we sit back in our seats surveying our damage and absolutely pleased with our selves.

"I'm as full as a tick." I laugh, I love when her southern mannerisms slip through. "So we're going back to the house to nap right?" I just shake my head no. We jump back into the Range and head off to the next destination. When I pull into the parking lot of the Santa Barbra Museum of Art she looks over at me again with her eyebrows raised.

"I know how much you love it here." Mellie and I head in and we spend a couple hours looking at the art. This was always where she liked to come to escape from it all, to be alone with her own thoughts and I am proud that she is allowing me to be here with her. We've come a long way.

When we leave she looks over at me.

"You're hungry I know." Mellie laughs loudly and I look over at her with a grin on my face.

"How did you know?"

"I know you." We drive for awhile. Fitz and I have lunch at a small cafe before heading off to the next destination.

"Why Fitzgerald are you trying to get me drunk?" She says in her best Scarlett O'Hara voice.

"No, not yet at least." Fitz and I go on a wine trail. I'm trying my best not to get tipsy. Thankfully we ate before coming here. The day has weaned once we are done with the wine trail, I'm a little buzzed, but in that good way that makes you feel light and bubbly. Fitz didn't have much to drink since he's driving and he looks over at me amused when I begin to skip down the street.

"Where are we going?"

"Here" He points and I look at my watch.

"I'm pretty sure here is closed." He grabs my hand and pulls me along. "Fitz they close early on Saturday." They is the Alice Keck Park Memorial Gardens, a place that holds fond memories for both of us and I know he wants to visit, but I also know they are closed. I just shut my mouth because he's determined. When we reach the entrance a large sign states closed, but before I can say I told you so he walks to the gate and opens it. I look at him wide eyed.

"After you m'lady." I swat his arm as I pass.

"What did you do?" He comes up behind me and whispers in my ear.

"You'll see." I shiver as his breath caresses my ear. He leads me into the park and we walk around surveying the beautiful scenery.

"You know you didn't have to go through all this trouble. We could have just came tomorrow." He doesn't speak as he continues to lead me around. Finally we reach the middle of the park and my breath catches in my throat and I cover my mouth.

We walk over the small bridge that resides over the turtle pond and there is a table set up. The trees are lit, soft music plays in the background.

I look over at Mellie wondering if she has any inkling of what my plan is. I don't think she does, she's just in shock it appears. We are seated and the private waiter I hired brings our dinner, pasta primavera, here favorite from her favorite Italian restaurant. After serving us the waiter disappears as I'd instructed.

"You surprised?"

"Yes of course you are just amazing Fitz. I wasn't expecting any of this."

"I know and that is what makes it all the more sweeter. I want to make the rest of our lives full of adventure and happiness. I want to put that smile on your face every day and I will take so much pride in knowing I put it there. I cannot thank you enough for giving me a second, third, fourth chance even though I surely didn't deserve it, but I will definitely make sure you get a good return on your investment this time." I stand from the table and walk over to Mellie, grabbing her hand as I go on one knee, not breaking eye contact.

My heart is thudding in my chest. I hadn't wanted to get my hopes up that this was going to happen, but when I realized that he was tracing the steps we took the day he proposed the first time I started to wonder.

"I love you with all my heart Melody Grant and I would not be half the man I am if not for your love, your patience, your belief in me that I could be a great man, even when I didn't believe it myself. I want to spend the rest of my life showing you and telling you how very much you mean to me, how much I am grateful for everything that you are to me, if you would allow me to be your husband again, will you marry me?" I take the ring out of my pocket and slip it onto her finger.

"Yes Fitzgerald I will marry you again." We laugh and I stand up taking her into my arms. We hug tightly before breaking apart and falling into a soul stirring kiss. I break the kiss again and just hold her to me so happy that she is going to allow me this honor. "Fitz do you remember what today is?"

"Of course it's the anniversary of when I first proposed to you." I nod my head in agreement.

"I'm trying to not just fall apart here."

"You are allowed." Fitz rubs away the errant tear with the pad of his thumb and I just lose it. "Hey hey I hope those are happy tears."

"They are, I just love you so much, I always have and I did not think we would make it and I'm just so happy." He pulls me back to him and we cling to each other. "By the way the ring is amazing." Fitz laughs loudly.

"That's my girl."


	19. Chapter 18

A/N Sorry this took so long to update. I've had all types of work stuff going on and honestly I was feeling some type of way about posting this chapter. This will probably be my last fic on here. I've noticed to put it a nice way a few fics "borrowing" from me and as much as I've tried to take it as flattery it's more annoying than anything else. I know I take that risk when putting my fics out here so I'm re-evaluating if I'm going to continue to do so. Thanks for all the support that all of you have shown.

I look around the house one last time, not because I'm worried I left something, the movers will make sure that everything comes along, but because I'm going to miss this place. When Fitz and I went to Santa Barbra I never imagined that so much would change and not just our engagement. We decided to wait until the kids were out of school to move back. We were both thankful we kept our house. Saying goodbye to D.C. was going to be more difficult than I ever imagined.

"You ok?" He walks up behind me and pulls me close.

"Yep just thinking about how I'm going to miss this place." Fitz lays his head on my shoulder.

"Me too." I turn in his arms and peck his lips.

"Can you two please knock it off?" Karen walks in and scrunches her face up. She still hasn't gotten used to seeing Fitz and I like this.

"Are you and the boys ready to go?"

"Yep ready when you two are." Karen walks back out of the room.

"You ready sweetie?"

"Absolutely, I'm ready to go start the rest of my life with you." Mellie and I leave the place we'd called home for over a decade, but we never truly felt settled here and California was always calling us home.

The plane ride to our home in Santa Barbra is surprisingly uneventful with two young children in tow. Mellie like the pro she is timed Tommy's nap just right and he slept most of the flight. When he woke he ate lunch and then was content to play quietly with Teddy.

Once the plane lands we all head to the house, a lot of our stuff has come before us . Karen disappears into her bedroom. Mellie and I get the boys settled before we go up to our room. She collapses on the bed.

"With all the help we have I can't believe how tiring it is to still move." I nod as I climb on the bed besides her.

"So I know we wanted to get the move out of the way, but not that we have let's set a wedding date." She rolls on her side and smiles at me as she plays with the collar of my shirt.

"You're pretty anxious to marry me huh?" I roll on my side and face her.

"Not really I just want an excuse to eat excessive amounts of cake." She laughs and my heart melts and I fall even deeper in love.

"I'm ready to get married whenever you are. I don't want a large affair just a few close friends and family."

Fitz rolls over and grabs his cellphone. He opens the calendar.

"What's your day looking like on June 20th?"

"Well I think on that day I'm getting married." He leans over and kisses me.

"Yes you are."

"So June 20th it is, gives me time to plan a little something."

"I should have picked a closer date, I honestly don't think I can wait that long."

"Fitz it's only two months away!"

"I know, but I'm anxious to have you as my wife again."

"And I'm anxious to be your wife." Our lips meet and the kiss soon goes from sweet and chaste, to hot and sensual. I pull away from him. "Close the door." He jumps out of bed, but before he can get to the door a little person appears in the doorway.

"I'm hungry daddy." Teddy looks up at Fitz with big blue eyes. He looks back at me with an exasperated look on his face as I mouth later to him. He leads Teddy out of the room to go fix him a snack.

1 Month Later

Mellie and I have spent the last month planning our wedding. Even though we decided on a very small affair there was still a venue to choose and a caterer to feed our guest. We also had to send out invitations all in a short amount of time. Mellie took the boys to the pediatrician and I got volunteered to pick her mother up from the airport. She'd insisted on coming in early to help Mellie finalize wedding plans, but I wonder if there were ulterior motives.

I arrive at the airport and she's already standing outside with her bags. I look at my watch and I'm confused her plane wasn't supposed to land for another ten minutes.

"Hello your plane got in early?" I say when I hop out of the truck to help her with her bags.

"I took an earlier flight. I've been waiting out here for almost an hour." When I turn my back I frown. She gets in the car.

"You should have let me know that you were coming in early." She shrugs.

"I didn't want to be a bother."

"I would have rather you let me know instead of sitting outside for an hour." She waves her hand in the air.

"It's fine Fitzgerald. How are my babies?"

"Fine everyone is fine. Mellie took the boys to meet the new pediatrician."

"You didn't want to go?"

"I came to pick you up." Since she found out about my affair with Olivia our relationship has been very strained. I can't say I blame her, I've hurt her baby girl after all.

"So are you sure you want to be her husband this time?" And there it is.

"Yes I am sure, I've always been sure." Her eyebrows quirk up.

"Really?" Mellie's mother is a soft spoken southern belle, but she is fiercely protective of her daughter.

"Yes, really. I made a lot of mistakes the first time around, but I never stopped loving her."

"Well I hope that is true. I've always liked you Fitz and looked at you as the son I never had, but you hurt her tremendously and you hurt me. I know it's the past and you two have moved on, but a part of me still has mistrust for you."

"I don't blame you and as a parent I understand where you are coming from. I hurt Mellie, I nearly destroyed my family. Gerry went to his grave never knowing how much I loved his mother and having us as a functional couple. I take a lot of that on myself. I never tried to find out why Mellie changed. I knew in my heart that the person she became wasn't her, that something was wrong. But I was a coward and I just let it be, I let her suffer in silence while I became angry and withdrawn. My affair with Olivia was a lot of anger towards Mellie, a lot of wanting to punish her for what I perceived was hurting me, but now I know better."

"I'm glad you told me that Fitz, I really think you have put a lot of things into perspective." She reaches over and pats my hand. We chat about less heavy subjects for the rest of the ride to the house. Once we arrive I take her bags up to the guest room so she can get settled. Mellie comes home with the boys after about an hour.

"How was the visit?" I say as I walk to her and kiss her cheek.

"Good, I love Dr. Ratner. She is a very accomplished pediatrician and very personable. Had no problems answering all of my thousands of questions and had a few for me."

"A few for you?"

"Yes, just stuff like what I'm expecting from her as the doctor of the boys." Mellie is about to go on when her mother comes downstairs. "Mom" She walks over to her. "So glad to see you." They hug tightly and begin to chat, they get so caught up they walk away leaving me standing in the foyer. I can't stop smiling, I'm so happy.

Three Weeks Later

The wedding is in a week and even though its small I'm fighting the inclination to become a bridezilla. I want things to be perfect and I feel with the small intimate nature that mistakes will be even more pronounced. What's driving me mad is my fiancé's lackadaisical attitude. Why can't he be as wired as I am? I nearly tore his hair off for taking so long to go and get the outfits for himself, my father and the boys. I had the dresses for myself, Karen and my mother weeks ago. They are altered, steamed and ready to go.

"Fitz!" I hear her calling me for the hundredth time and I cringe.

"Yes dear!" She comes storming into the den.

"Did you confirm with the florist that they'll have the white orchids that I want?"

"Yes dear I did, everything is all set."

"Did you make sure that the caterer knows to set up at ten instead of nine thirty?"

"Yes Mel, I've taken care of that too." Fitz reaches over to me and grabs my wrist, pulling me down onto his lap. He runs his fingers through my hair. "Baby relax, it's going to be perfect. You know why?" I lean my forehead against his.

"Because we are in love and we are getting married and we will spend the rest of our lives together."

"Mmmhmmm" He kisses me softly and the kiss begins to deepen when I hear my parents come back from their brunch date. I pull away from Fitz and roll my eyes, it's been awhile since we've been able to be intimate. It seems like every time we try someone interrupts. I hop off his lap and take a deep breath.

"You are right I need to calm down. As long as us and the minister show up nothing else matters."

"Right nothing else matters, but it will be a beautiful day." I smile at him slightly, I know he's right and I need to chill out.

The Big Day

Mellie's father and I decide to stay at a hotel to allow the women the house to get ready and do whatever they do. It's a relaxing day for us. We sit on the balcony of the hotel overlooking the ocean and enjoy a nice bourbon.

"You ready to make it final this time?"

"Yes sir." I was waiting for this conversation.

"Don't hurt her Fitzgerald."

"I won't sir I promise. I've seen the error of my ways." I've had to explain this fifty times if I've explained it once, but I understand everyone's reluctance and need for reassurance.

"You planning on blessing us with more grandchildren."

"Oh God no, we are way too old for that." He huffs.

"I was hoping you two would have one more." I can't stop from laughing.

"Is this what I'm going to be like when my kids start having kids?" He shrugs. "I mean having grandkids is like an addiction for you two." He laughs and shakes his head, before sobering and looking over at me.

"I've never seen her look happier." A smile spreads across my face.

"Me either and I like to think I had something to do with that."

"I think you had a lot to do with it."

The House

I'm trying to relax, relate, release ,but my nervousness is creeping in again. I'm not nervous about marrying Fitz, I'm nervous about things going as I want them too. I can't help it I'm an OCD type A personality and I have a vision in my head and I want that vision played out. I keep checking my cell for messages, in case there are any last minute problem's but there are no messages, much to my relief, but my relief is short lived when I wonder if people are just keeping things from me.

"Mrs. Grant I need you to hold still so I don't stab you in the head with a hair pin." Sandra my hairstylist rubs my arm. "Everything will be fine." She tries to sooth my raw nerves. Jenny rubs my feet a little more, also trying to relieve some of my anxiety and tension. My team continues to work on me and I work hard to let the trepidation melt away.

Our wedding is an intimate affair, fifty of our closest friends and family. We chose to get married on the beach and to then have a small cocktail hour with our guests. When my team finishes with me I slip into my dress and slippers that I've purchased to wear to the venue. Karen comes into the room after getting dressed and I have to fan my eyes to keep from crying, she looks stunning.

"Oh my sweetheart you are so beautiful." I hug her tightly, fighting to keep the tears at bay.

"Don't cry mom you'll ruin your makeup and then you'll have to get it redone and you'll be late and then..."

"I'll freak out." I finish for her. Karen, my mother and myself head to the waiting car.

I've been charged with getting Teddy and Tommy ready and they are being very well behaved. Jackson watches the boys while I get dressed. I stand in the mirror making sure my hair looks good and my clothes are straight. I am so anxious. I can't wait to see her walk down the aisle and become my wife again and forever this time.

The time has finally come for us to become man and wife again. My mind keeps flashing back to the times we had in the White House, who would have ever dreamed we'd be here again and of our own accord. My dad walks into the bridal suite and he looks dashing in his crisp white shirt and khaki colored pants. We went very informal. I can tell he's not comfortable being bare foot but he does it for me. The planner hands me my single white orchid, and Karen her blue one. She is wearing a simple light blue sheath dress that compliments my white one.

Karen walks in front of us and heads down the makeshift aisle that we've made on the beach. My father takes my hand and pats it before kissing my temple.

"Let's go get your forever happiness." He's not usually the sappy type so I look at him surprised, the love being reflected through his blue eyes brings tears to mine.

"Thank you daddy. I love you."

"I love you too my girl."

The soft music of the harp begins to play and I see my beautiful little girl first. Karen walks down the aisle with a smile on her face and her head held high. When she reaches the alter I step to her and kiss her cheek. Finally the violinist begins to play the familiar strings of _Here Comes the Bride_ and all of our guest stand. I see her and my heart leaps into my throat, she's so beautiful. She is wearing a simple white dress, her hair pinned up with a few cascading curls framing her face. She's holding a single white orchid and walks towards me with a dazzling smile on her face.

When I see Fitz standing at the altar with his white shirt and black pants on, I realize he is the most beautiful man I've ever laid eyes on. The mist in the air from the ocean has caused his hair to curl and he looks like the young man I met all those years ago. I look to his left and see his mini me's dressed just like their dad and behaving surprisingly well. I can't help, but to think that Gerry should be standing by his father's side, but I put the thought away.

I finally reach him and he steps down taking my hand in his and we turn to face the minister.

"Who giveth that this woman be married to this man?"

"Her mother and I."

To my relief the ceremony goes as planned and we say our vows. We both have a difficult time keeping our eyes off of each other.

After Mellie and I exchange rings we don't release each other's hands.

"By the power vested in me and the state of California I pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss your bride."

I turn to her quickly and take her in my arms, planting a searing kiss on her. Her lips part and I slip my tongue in, momentarily forgetting where I am until the minister clears his throat. Mellie and I break apart looking sheepish. I hold my hands up in apology and our guest chuckle.

"I am proud to present Mr. and Mrs. Fitzgerald Grant III for the second and hopefully final time." He states with a laugh, everyone joins in.

Mellie and I walk towards where we are holding our small reception, a spot on the beach with tables set up. The sun is starting to set and the candles and lights decorating the space, create a romantic mood. We are happy to have a moment alone. I take her into my arms and our lips meet. My hands roaming her back until I slide them down and cup her ass. She pulls away, with a smirk on her face.

"Fitz we can't." I know she's right. "Even though I really really really want to." We look at each other and start to howl with laughter.

We join our guests to uproarious applause. Everyone comes to greet us giving us well wishes. After a light dinner we head to the dance floor for our first dance. Fitz takes me gently into his arms as the first strings of music began to play.

_I Have never been so much  
>In love Before<br>What a difference  
>A true love made in my life<br>So nice  
>So right<br>Loving you gave me something new  
>That I've never felt<br>Never dreamed of  
>Something's changed<br>No it's not the feeling I had before  
>Oh it's much much more<br>Love  
>I never knew that a touch<br>Could mean  
>So much<br>What a difference_

The music takes us back to the beginning of this journey. That night when he came to my house to watch the kids was the day that set us on this course to reconciliation. I didn't see it then and I'm sure as hopeful as he was he didn't see it then either, but here we are ready to embark on the rest of our lives, together.

_I feel  
>So real<br>Lovers come  
>And then lovers go<br>That's what folks say  
>Don't they know<br>They're not there when you love me, hold me and say you care  
>And what we have is much more than they can see<em>

I have never loved anyone the way I love Mellie. I think of my past lovers, even Olivia and there was never anyone that made me feel whole like she does. There was never anyone that made me feel ok with just being me. I never had to put on airs with her. From the moment I met her she wanted to help me, not to become President, but to become a self realized person, a man that was happy with who he was. Mellie always went to the mat for me and it took awhile for me to realize why, but I understand now, she loves me despite of and because of. I look in her eyes and I am anxious to start the rest of our lives, together.


End file.
